Hearts of the Past
by mayajane
Summary: Hermione's broken promise takes her and Harry where they couldn't have expected.Drama and heartbreak ensue.Rated M for violence and brief language and sexual content.
1. Lies

Chapter one- Lies

It was the end of the day here at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I was making my way down the long hallway, my back shoes creating the strange echoing tapping sound. It seemed I was the last Gryffindor to make it to the Common Room because the halls were deserted. Or so I thought. A few moments later I heard a girl's voice muttering. I didn't recognize it at first, but when I rounded the corner, I saw my best friend, Hermione Granger, seated on her knees. I stopped walking, wondering how she hadn't heard me coming. She hastily shoved her books into her bag and grabbed something shiny off the ground before turning to face me. She squealed loudly and dropped her things again.

"Harry! Oh, goodness." She breathed as I bent down to get her bag. Before I could reach for the gold metal object she snatched it up holding it away from me. I stared at her a moment longer. There was only one thing she would hide from me. Okay, two things. Boys…and a Time Turner.

"Hermione Jane Granger, that had better not be what I think it is." I said harshly. I couldn't believe this! She had promised me over and over she wouldn't ever use a Time Turner again. Not after what happened to her.

"Harry….I can explain." She whispered clutching the abomination closer to her. Was it possible to become addiction such an object? I shook my head, knowing I had to calm myself down.

"I needed it for my studies! I had to-

I lost it when she said that. The hall we were in filled with a white light and the windows shattered predictably. They weren't meant to withstand my strength and power at such a raw level. Hermione didn't flinch. She knew things like this happened when I got angry, and she must have known her saying that would cause me to lose it. She did it on purpose to make me worry about her instead of mad at what she did. Conniving witch!

"I cannot believe this. You're playing on my weakness to cover your own arse? Do you not remember what the healer said? Your studies aren't worth anything on your life Hermione. She told you know more time jumping. That was only two years ago! She said it could give you a brain tumor!"

Hermione immediately responded as if she had spent hours preparing for this confrontation. "Harry, she said there was a small chance of that happening and only three people in the world have been proven to have gotten a tumor that resulted from time traveling. That hasn't happened in two decades. I'm fine. Just peachy even. I never go back more than two hours and not every day. Three or four times a week if that much. I'm being careful Harry. I am."

It sounded like she was trying to convince herself instead of me.

" What about the headaches that turn into migraines? The nose bleeds? Maybe the chance you never have children? Time Turners aren't used for what you're using it for! They are used to stop muggles from discovering magic. I would like to know where you got it."

Hermione hesitated. "McGonagall. I begged for it, told her I wouldn't have enough time for all twelve of my classes without it. I need those newts Harry. I need them."

"Like hell you do!" I snapped and she flinched this time. I held out my hand. I wasn't going to let her hurt herself like this.

She shook her head, her hair falling into her face. I sighed and stepped towards her. She took a step back so I set my bag down and grabbed her. She moved away too quickly and broke into a run. I raced after, have more speed because of morning runs. I over powered her easily and snatched her around the waist. She still had it clutched in her hand and I tried to pry it open without hurting her. The whole point of taking it away was so she _didn't _hurt herself.

I felt her relax suddenly, but I'd expected her to try that and didn't let up on my hold. I pried her hand open and reached for the Timer Turner. She clutched her hand again and the chain caught around our wrists as it fell to the ground, turning.

I heard her gasp and I felt a moment of pure fear. Then we were gone.

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><p>AN: First of all, I know Harry seems unusually harsh to Hermione, but that will be explained as the story goes on. I hope you all enjoy it! I already have the second chapter written!


	2. Silent Treatment

Chapter 2- Silent Treatment

I fell onto grassy hard ground and with a Hermione on top of me. I sucked in a shocked breath and looked around. It was still evening and we were in the court yard. A stone bench was right next to us and I got up, groaning. Man I was going to have bruises. I didn't help Hermione up. She looked to have been expecting it and huffed when she sat down next to me. There wasn't anyone in the courtyard so I guessed it was around dinner time. There was a piece of glass stuck in Hermione's arm. It was tiny; I only saw it in the glare of the sun. I reached over and yanked it out. I vanished it with my wand and remained silent. She rubbed her arm with was probably throbbing quite a bit.

I stood and started limping toward the door. Hermione got to her feet and raced after me. Figures that she wasn't hurt. Not that I wanted her to be, of course not, but it seemed I always had to look out for her when I shouldn't have to. I purposely walked ahead of her so she wouldn't try and talk. I didn't want to hear how sorry she was. I knew she was sorry. I knew she would promise not to do it again. The problem was she did it in the first place. Hermione was so smart. So why was she being so damn stupid?

My hands clenched into fist as we rounded the corner just in time so see Professor McGonagall at the headmaster's entrance.

"Professor!" I called and walked more quickly. I had a feeling we'd gone into the past, but how much I wasn't sure.

She turned to meet us, her expression turning to one of confusion.

"I'm Henry and this is Harriet. We're lost and need to speak with Headmaster Dumbledore." I wasn't sure what time we were in so I assumed it was safer to go with fake names. Even if they were completely stupid.

"I'm afraid it is too late to be seeing him. He's not as young as he used to be." She said, suspiciously.

"You're lying." I said bluntly.I dont think anyone I've ever met had called Albus Dumbledore _old. _She colored and said the password. It was a silent way up and I walked through the door without knocking. I wanted this over with. I wanted to go home, take my Newts, and move on with my life.

He was sitting at his desk, writing on some parchment slowly, as if he were doodling.

"Albus I am so sorry, but these children are lost and said they needed to speak with Headmaster Dumbledore."

I calmed myself down. I was still angry with Hermione and it was making me snappish.

"Sorry for intruding, Albus, but I need to know what year it is before anything else." I said and Hermione stiffened.

"Harry, you cant speak like that to him!" I turned to glare at her, one for giving away my name and secondly for telling me what to do.

"Why should I listen to a thing you've got to say? I am beyond furious with you. Just stay silent while I fix your mess." I snapped and she glared right back me with a hurt expression. My resolve to not speak with her cracked.

"Mione, I'm sorry, I'm just tired and don't want to deal with this. And it is your fault." I said softly and turned back to Albus. I probably should have been more formal. Both Professors were looking at us with intrigue and I sighed.

"The year?" I demanded.

"1977."

"Damn it all to hell!" I screamed and sank into a chair, pulling at my hair. Hermione hadn't moved.

"How can that be?" she exclaimed suddenly into the silence.

"Hermione I think you should be quiet if you can't use your brain. You're stupid addiction landed us here."

I saw her sink in front of me, "You listen to me Harry, I am sorry, but you have no right to talk to me this way in front of our Professors. And you know it."

"You'll get your apology when I'm home." I turned back to the headmaster.

"Sir, I'm sorry but it seems we've hit a rough patch. We're from 1997. It was an…accident between me and my friend Hermione here. I assume you don't even have Time Turners powerful enough at the moment?"

"You're right, we do not. Your name was?"

"Harry, Sir, and I am sorry for the use of your first name. I wasn't thinking."

The headmaster looked his twenty years younger as did Minerva. I really need to stop using first names.

"Well, Harry no- last-name, I do not know what to do with you. Do you have any family in this time."

I flinched involuntarily. My first answer would be no, but that wouldn't be true. Not in this time.

"None that would know who I was, would it be possible to stay here? I could go to classes? I have some of my money in my pocket for us to use. We're seventh years. Hermione is already of age." I said quickly.

"Sir, I'm muggle-born, so I couldn't go to any of my family here. I would like to stay if you'll have me. Us."

I gritted my teeth. I knew I had it wasn't good to get so angry this way, but without potions nothing seemed to work. I couldn't rely on potions forever anyway.

"I think that would be best. I gather you know me well, Harry."

"Better than anyone." I said smugly. It wasn't true, but it felt nice to say. It was convenient that he was alive here. He died only a year and a half ago back in my real time. It seemed like it had been less time, especially when he was sitting across from me.

He raised an eyebrow, "I mean better than any of your other students. I believe Aberforth knew your past best, and your future. He sure predicted everything correctly." His eyes widened and I worried for a second I offended him.

"Aberforth? I haven't talked to him in fifteen years. Do you know why, Harry?"

"Yes. But no one else does in this room so…" Dumbledore looked shaken, more so than I had ever seen him. Aside from the night of his death. I still have night mares about it. Hermione rested her hand on my shoulder comfortingly. I allowed it.

"Very well. I have one last question. I have to know." He whispered.

"He's dead." I answered, knowing he would ask. I would too. He blinked and looked like the world had righted itself while he wasn't looking.

"Okay, we'll talk more tomorrow. You'll join classes on Monday. Goodnight you too. I trust you know where you'll be staying."

"Yes, Sir, thank you. Professor." I nodded to Minerva and led Hermione out the door and to the seventh floor corridor. The Room of Requirement would have a welcome bed.

"Harry, I'm sorry I was so stupid and I've ruined your happiness again. I really don't mean too." She was crying. I sighed. What could I do?

"It'll be alright. We always make it."

I turned to face her just as we came to the door. I smiled at her warmly and pulled her into a fierce hug. She sobbed into my shoulder for a few moments before squeezing back tightly.

"I always think every fight will be the last and you'll tire of helping me. I don't know what I would do without a big brother like you to protect me."

It was the right thing to say. I was her brother in every way, except blood.

"I made a promise, Hermione. I intend to keep it."

We made our way into the room of requirement, sighing as the room shifted to reveal two soft, beautiful looking beds, along with a bathroom from heaven. Hermione crawled into bed and was asleep within two minutes. I stayed awake for a while longer thinking about what are lives were going to be now.

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><p>AN: Chapter 2! Harry is still being rather mean, but he mellows out in chapter three when they start going to classes. Reviews are loved. I should update again within two days!


	3. Remembering

Chapter 3- Remembering

I woke up before Harry did, and yawned widely. Harry was lying on top of his covers like he only gotten into bed moments before. I quietly got out of bed and went into the bathroom. It was the nicest bathroom I had ever seen. I started the shower and locked the door. A habit of mine, living at home. Harry obviously wouldn't walk in on me. I washed quickly and brushed my teeth twice, to make up for missing last night.

I leaned on the sink, thinking. This was my fault, I knew. I don't know why I chose to defy Harry. He didn't own me, but his request not to use Time Turners was a good and honest one and I should have listened. We wouldn't be here If had. He was trying to protect me. I had to get it in my head that I didn't always know best. I magically dried my hair and pulled it away from my face. It was still as wild as it was when I was eleven, but now the curls were sensual and less childlike. My face had lost baby fat, no surprise there, and I was thinner all around. I didn't want think about why.

I exited the bathroom, seeing that Harry was awake. He had purple circles under his eyes. It made my heart clench painfully. I was the reason he couldn't sleep last night.

Harry went into the bathroom without even looking at me and I felt my eyes sting. Would he forgive me this time? He was all I had left! I knew crying would upset him, because he would think I was trying to make him feel guilty. It wouldn't be the first time, but I couldn't hold back tears and sank down onto my bed.

I missed my family and friends. The war was over, but with so many losses. My parents, Harry's parents, Ron, Fred, Remus, Sirius, Dumbledore and Tonks were just the people I knew well enough to feel their loss. There were over twenty first years lost. I shuddered when I remembered. Voldemort had taken them from Kings Cross before they boarded the train. That was a horrifying day. The worst of it would have been when my parents, me, Ron and Harry were taken.

Harry exited the bathroom and motioned for me to follow him. If he noticed I was crying he didn't say anything. I knew this Harry was just the angry one. It was my fault and he would come to his senses again soon enough. We headed to the headmaster office silently, keeping a distant from each other. It hurt my heart that I failed Harry again and I might not be able to make up for it this time.

Harry suddenly stopped in the hall. We were only a few feet away from the entrance to the headmaster's office.

He sighed deeply, running his fingers through his unruly hair. I always thought that was an endearing habit of his.

"Hermione, I'm done fighting with you, I promise. It just took me a while to let go of all that anger. We need to stick together from now on, until we get home. If we get home." Harry looked so sincere and helpless. I tackled him in a hug, thanking my lucky stars that he was here. I don't know what I would have done without him here.

"Thanks, Harry." I whispered. He nodded, embarrassed by my outright display of affection for him. He knew I held him in the brightest light possible. He was the best!

We continued to the headmaster's office, with a new spring in our steps. It was like a weight had been lifted.

"You two look well rested!" Dumbledore said as a greeting, even though Harry was obviously tired. I smiled a little and sat down, looking for my schedule among the many pieces of parchment scattered on his desk.

"Ahh, Miss Granger, I assumed you were the more studious. I have yet to make your class schedules. I have no idea if the same classes are even offered in your time. So why don't you tell me what you've been taking?"

Harry answered before I could say anything. "Sir, we're seventh years, so Hermione are taking the same classes. Potions, Charms, Transfiguration, and Defense against the Dark Arts were what we were currently taking."

I wanted to mention Ancient Runes, but Harry gave me a look. I guess now wasn't really the time to mention it.

Dumbledore looked thoughtful and with a flick of his wand to schedules appeared. I reached for mine excitedly.

I had Charms and Potions on Monday and then Double Transfiguration on Wednesday. Thursday was a free day and Friday I had Double DA. I frowned at the free day, sure I could have Ancient Runes that day, but Harry and I had just made up and I didn't want to upset him. I would have time for the other classes when we went home. _If_ we went home, I amended in my head. I felt a race of fear in my stomach. We didn't have much left at home, but it was still our home and the people we loved were there. What would we do if we never went home?

"Thank you so much, Professor. We need our books though, so may we go to Diagon alley today?" I asked without looking up from my new schedule. I heard Harry chuckle and I looked up. Two stacks of books were on the desk. I flushed, and glared at Harry for laughing at me. I reached for my set of books and would have started reading right there in the office but Dumbledore started speaking.

"You two are from the year 1997, correct?" He started and continued at our nods. "I have informed the ministry about the situation and they do have a potion in the making for you to be sent home. However, there is no telling when the formula will be finished or how long it will take to actually make it. So don't get your hopes up. You're both Gryffindor's? Yes? Very well, I suppose you'll need to buy this year's school robes. Yours stand out quite a bit. Please be back within two hours. You may use my floo."

It was so strange to hear Dumbledore talking to us so distantly. We knew him very well, Harry better than I did. I looked over at Harry and he looked uncomfortable and I saw pain in his eyes. Dumbledore was oblivious.

"Harry you go on ahead, I need to speak with the Headmaster for just a moment. I'll be careful, promise." Harry looked upset but he flooed away while I took my seat once again.

"Miss Granger, is something wrong?" He asked, politely. Detached. I frowned.

"Yes there is. I know we're in the past and you aren't the man we knew in our time."

"Knew? So I assume I've come to an end in your time?" I nodded sadly.

"Harry was with you when you were killed, Sir." I hesitated when he paled noticeably. Very subtle, Hermione. I should have eased into this. I shouldn't have said it so bluntly.

"Sorry sir, I was too straightforward about that. But you're an adult. Harry and I…we've been through so much together. We did it because of you, and you've only ever been affectionate with us. Now you're being polite and that's fine because you don't know us, but it's hurting him. I can tell."

I let him absorbed all of it and shifted uneasily in my seat.

"He was with me? Why? He's just a student! How old was he?" Dumbledore asked incredulously.

"He was sixteen. I don't know what happened; I just know he was there. He saw everything. Now you're alive and right in front of him and he doesn't know how to feel. He won't ever say anything about it. He probably doesn't want to lose you again. You were like the grandfather he never knew. Harry grew up without his family. Hogwarts has always been his home, but what I'm trying to say is, get to know him. Try and care about him like I know you will in the future, sir. You won't regret it."

Dumbledore nodded, seeming calm. "Lord Voldemort is dead in your time."

"Yes, Tom is dead. No I won't tell you how it happened. He out lived you though." I said tonelessly. I hated talking about the war. Hated it with a passion.

"I fail to see how that's possible. Who killed him? I've been dreaming that would be my honor."

I sneered at him, outraged. "See that you work on your relationship with Harry, Albus, we've lost too many people to not be rewarded with for it."

I opened the floo connection, aggravated beyond belief. Harry was tapping his foot impatiently. I just marched past him, heading into the crowded streets of Diagon alley. Harry followed quickly, so he wouldn't lose me in the crowd. I went to the shop we'd been going to for all our years at Hogwarts. Harry waited for his turn silently, probably wondering what caused my anger.

We left the shop with lighter pockets and new school robes and dress robes. In theory we could be here for the end of the year dance and we would need them.

"Have you ever felt that killing Tom was an honor?" I asked breaking the silence. Harry froze and turned, his green eyes twinkling madly.

"Never." His voice was flat and emotionless, much like mine, I assumed, when I talked about the war. Too much was involved to feel it all when it came up.

"I know, of course, I know. I just…he said it would be!" I fumed quickening my pace. He took my forearm and led me to a nearby ice cream stand. He sat me down at a table and ordered. He didn't speak until I was eating my chocolate cone with enthusiasm.

"I know that's how he saw it Hermione. It was never a secret. I could just tell from the beginning. Let it go."

I sighed, "Okay Harry, but I'm so mad he feels that way. Well, but we always knew he was flawed." I pointed out, eating my chocolate ice cream faster because it was starting to melt. Harry laughed at me when I moaned from a brain freeze.

"Smart, Mione, really smart."

We returned to our the Room of Requirement, because I was ready to start reading those text books. Harry said he wanted nap before classes tomorrow. I rolled my eyes and settled into my bed with all my books, while Harry went to bed. It surprises me that he can sleep when the light are on, since there aren't windows in the room. It was only two in the afternoon. My stomach rumbled. I stupidly called for Dobby. I smacked myself in the head. A crack sounded and I looked up to see a clearly childish Dobby.

"Dobby?" I gasped and he nodded happily. His voice was squeakier than ever and he was maybe a few inches shorter.

"I is Dobby Miss!" I relaxed and smiled, wondering just how old the Dobby in my time had been.

"Well, Dobby could I get a late lunch in here please? Maybe something for my friend as well?"

Dobby was only too happy to do that and disappeared with a crack. I smiled widely, returning to my book.

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><p>The next morning Harry woke me up with a rough shake to the shoulder.<p>

"It's eight o'clock Mione. Get your lazy arse up!" Harry yelled, crawling onto my bed. I shoved him away, not in the mood. Then what he said registered in my mind. Classes started in an hour! I scrambled out of bed and into the shower in five seconds flat. Once I was clean and my hair presentable I exited the bathroom and gave Harry a stern look.

"Thanks for waiting so long to wake me. You obviously only need fifteen minutes to get ready while I need much longer. You're so going to pay for that, Harry." I said teasingly. He had done this many times before during the year.

Harry just laughed as we headed down to breakfast. We took our seats at the Gryffindor table, but Harry was scared silly. I took his arm and sat him down a few feet away from his father. I closed my eyes. How could I have forgotten!

"Oh Harry I am so sorry! I don't know how I forgot!" Harry shrugged it off and dug into his breakfast, ignoring the looks we were receiving.

I peaked a look down that table at Harry's father. He was very handsome. Just like Harry himself was, but they looked very alike. What if people asked questions? Sirius Black was sitting next to James Potter and Peter Pettigrew was across from them on the other side of the table. I felt my heart beat quicken with rage, but I smiled when I saw Remus Lupin looking down at us. Harry raised an eyebrow at me.

"What? I can say I see where you get your looks from Harry. You dad is rather good looking." I teased and he flushed with pleasure and embarrassment. I sighed contently. This is the relationship we should have all the time.

Harry tensed and I followed his gaze and saw exactly why. If James was good looking then Harry's mum was absolutely gorgeous. She had flowing red hair and those eyes were more expressive than Harry's! I guess that would make sense though. Lily Evans was speaking to some woman I didn't recognize until she turned towards me. Molly Weasely. I had no idea what her maiden name was, she had always been a Weasely to me. She was older than lily, maybe by a year.

I turned back to harry who motioned for me to eat something. I grabbed some bacon and a biscuit, wondering if it was even safe to make any friends here.

"Can we-

I was cut off when Dumbledore rose and called for everyone to be quite.

"I would like to introduce our two knew transfer students. Harry and Hermione have been place in Gryffindor house and will be with us temporarily. Let's give them a war, Hogwarts welcome!"

A half-heart round of applause resulted and Harry and I got up to leave.

"Gryffindors? Well, come over here you two and we'll let you know whose evil in the teacher department."

I saw Harry flinch and I almost did as well. Sirius had been gone for longer than most but it still hurt Harry quite a bit to hear his voice. I felt guilty all over again. I was the reason he had to go through this façade.

"Alright, what's your name?" Harry asked pulling me with him down the bench. I could hear my breath coming out in shallow pants. My palms were sweating. Remus was staring at me. I felt my heart wrench thinking of the last time we spoke.

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><p>"<em>Hermione…I don't know how to make this easier for you. Ron was a friend of a lifetime, but he would have understood that you needed to move on quickly to survive. You'll have time to grieve later, and I'll be there for you when the time comes. After you and Harry came home I was so relieved but you've changed in ways I'll never understand. You know you can talk to me about anything."<em>

_I looked over at my best friend next to Harry and smiled. _

"_I've always known that Remus. I know I can always count on you. Ron was…he was…the best guy all around. I don't know what I'll do without him to fight with."_

_Remus chuckled, "I'm sure Harry will help with that." I flinched imperceptibly. Harry had his own nightmares right now. I gave Remus a bright smile that was also unfortunately, completely fake._

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><p>Harry was shaking me, and I gasped, tearing away from him and running from the great hall. I leaned my forehead against the cold stone wall, trying to calm myself down. It was so easy to <em>forget<em> about everyone I cared about. Remus had been a huge part of me and I'd forgotten all of it.

Harry was right beside me and I wiped my tears away.

"He was my best friend Harry…how did I just forget it all?" I asked in a small, frustrated voice.

Harry smiled sadly. "Because it hurts to much to remember."

I nodded with a sob and he wrapped his arms around me.

"Come on, we'll go to classes and talk later. About everything."

I hugged him back and we made our way to class, joined at the hip.

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><p>AN: Chapter 3! This one was a bit more intense and the war will start coming up more. Reviews are awesome and give inspiration. Enjoy.


	4. Capture

Chapter 4- Capture

In the end we told Remus that I was extremely shy and never got along with new people. He accepted that and pretended that my reaction earlier was normal for me. Harry and I were relieved. We didn't expect James to suddenly take a liking to me. Harry informed me that his father was staring at me more than was normal for a new student.

So one day I said hi to him in the library. I was surprised to see him there too but I listened in while he was talking to Madam Pince.

"Remus says he needs that book desperately but can't get it today. He asked me to come get it for him." That made more sense than James Potter ever going into the library on his own.

He was handed the book angrily and send on his way. As he walked pass me I said, "Hi, James."

He paused and walked back towards me. "You said something?" He said stiffly.

I nodded feeling confused. He sounded angry, even though he seemed happy enough five seconds ago.

"I just said hello. Sorry to have bothered you." I snapped and returned to my book. He probably just didn't like me and that's why he stared.

"Are you with Harry? I mean are you and Harry a couple?" He was flushed with color when I looked back up at him. My heart clenched. I heard that question before. From Ron.

"No. I'm not." I whispered and shook my head. This wasn't the time to think about Ron. Definitely not.

James relaxed and took a seat next to me. I stared at him.

"Would that be a problem for you?" I asked suspiciously. He couldn't possibly be interested in me like that!

"Yes because the love of my life insisted that you aren't right for him."

My jaw dropped incredulously. I knew I looked rather stupid, not a good look for me, and closed it.

"Well we aren't together, never have been and never will be. Harry's the best big brother I could have ever asked for. We aren't really related though." I told him softly, my voice returning to the appropriate whisper in the library.

James nodded and set the book down on the table. "How long have you known him?"

I shut my book, aware he would have questions now he wasn't angry with me. "I- it's been 8 years." I whispered suddenly recalling Harry's birthday over the summer and mine just a week before we….came here.

James looked surprised and I swore inwardly. I should have said six or seven! Now he'll ask how old I am.

"You met before school?" he asked skeptically. I was about to answer when Harry walked toward us.

"Harry? That a cool name. We were just talking ab-

"I heard what you talked about and I think you had better apologize to Hermione." Harry said firmly.

I swallowed loudly, before sighing. I should have expected this reaction. James looked shocked and a little upset.

"And what should I apologize for?" He asked angrily. I stood up and went over to Harry.

"Don't do this. He just asked if-

"I heard him Hermione. He didn't ask he demanded and acted like a complete child. He should apologize for being the biggest disappointment of my life."

"_Harry!"_ I said urgently, but he didn't even look at me and I felt his magic surface, though his wand was in his bag.

"Potter, apologize for being a prick." Harry's voice was so cold that I shivered and stepped away from him. I wasn't afraid for myself, but for James. Harry couldn't kill him or he wouldn't ever be born!

"I apologize, Hermione. I didn't mean any harm." James said softly to me.

"It's perfectly fine. Harry is just very protective of me." I assured him, stepping in front of Harry. He was still very angry.

"I see. Well I won't be bothering you again." James left the library in a hurry, after grabbing Remus's book off my table. We were alone now.

"THAT STUPID UNBELIEVABLE PRICK! WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS TALKING TO YOU THAT WAY!" Harry thundered so loudly that I flinched away from him. He didn't notice or didn't care.

There wasn't any calming him down, not over his father. I was a little disappointed in James, but he wasn't my dad. My dad was dead. I felt another round of guilt. The only reason he was feeling this betrayal was because I brought us here.

"Harry-

He wasn't having it though. His magic exploded from his body and all the books, tables, and chairs overturned. Harry didn't stop his magic this time. He was probably tired from keeping it all in. So was I. I sealed the library doors, so not even Dumbledore could get in. I forgot about madam Pince though.

He let out scream after scream, I couldn't even tell what he was saying, but I heard Ron's name once or twice and I flinched. I ran away from Harry to the part of the library he hadn't terrorized. I didn't know what to do. Harry hadn't had an outburst this bad before. I could feel my eyes watering and tears running down my face. The dust in the older book had risen and it was like inhaling a cloud of dirt.

Then everything was silent. I was crouched by a bookcase that was still standing and everything was so silent that I could hear my own breathing.

"Harry!" I called out, but I didn't get up. I knew he wouldn't hurt me, Harry wasn't capable of that, but he would be angry. I didn't like angry Harry.

He didn't answer me. He might have fainted. I stood up, my legs shaking and my heart racing. I walked on shaky legs to where I left him. He had fainted and was lying on his stomach, his face oddly peaceful. I fell to my knees beside him and gripped his hands. They were ice cold. I knew he was fine, but I still felt an unpleasant shiver of fear race down my back. Cold meant dead. I knew Harry wasn't dead, but I dropped his hand and stood up. I had to clean this up.

I righted the book cases, the tables and chairs. Then I fixed the books. There were so many of them, scattered all over the ground, the spines ripped and some destroyed. A few were burnt. I fixed them the best I could and put them on the shelves in the correct order. I didn't pause to see if Harry had woken up. It didn't matter to me right now. I had to clean up.

I heard a groan and I didn't pay attention to it. I thought it was Harry, but when it didn't stop I looked over and saw Harry still lying where I found him. Who was making that noise?

It came from the checkout desk. I raced over and found what I expected. Madam Pince was on the floor, covered in heaps of book. I could only see her hair and wrist. I hovered the books off of her and they went to their spots on the shelves. Madam Pince was hurt. It looked like it was a bad broken arm and maybe a wrist. So much for not having anyone find out.

"Wandless magic….." she muttered and I felt the blood drain from my face. How could I be so stupid! Here I was doing magic without my wand anywhere near me.

"Madam Pince, I'm going to get Madam Pomfrey and you'll be just fine. Hold on a second.

"_Expecto Patronum." _My silver swan appeared and waited for instructions. "Find Madam Pomfrey. Tell her Madam Pince is hurt and needs help in the Library."

My swan ran out of the room and I continued cleaning up, since Madam Pince was unconscious. I didn't feel well enough to heal her on my own. I didn't even know if I could heal broken arms or concussions. I'd only ever healed a knife wound. I shivered remembering, but I didn't need to remember right now.

I opened the Library door and Madam Pomfrey entered the room, with a medical kit.

"She's behind the checkout desk." I told her and went back to cleaning up; with my wand this time.

She stared at me for a moment and then made her way behind the desk. I sealed the doors while she wasn't looking. Once everything was back in order I sat down next to Harry on the ground. He was peaceful and he wouldn't wake until tomorrow. He usually needed recovery time. One thing about accidental magic that I had researched said that you would also need a week to be able to perform magic again. Harry never needed anytime. The moment he woke up he could do magic perfectly fine and controlled as normal.

"Hermione? That's your name isn't it?" I nodded without looking up from Harry. I needed to watch over him until he woke. I felt a wave of exhaustion and before I knew I was asleep.

* * *

><p>"<em>Harry we'll be perfectly safe to go to Hogsmeade. Its fine, Dumbledore even said so." Ron said happily as we headed down to the hogshead. Harry was getting to much publicity these days to go to the three broom sticks. <em>

_Ron's mood was contagious and as we made our way to a table in the back of the almost empty restaurant, we were laughing. _

_Three butter beers for table and then Ron was telling us the latest in the profession Quidditch season. Harry was the only one listening, since I never really cared much about the sport. I was watching the door. I never really felt comfortable being out in the open like this, not since the Auror attack two months ago. They left a message saying we would be next. I believed that, but no one else did. They thought we were untouchable, when couldn't be farther from the truth. I was surprised Dumbledore even let us out of the castle._

_A stunner came from behind the bar. I felt it coming before it hit us, but there was enough time to shield Ron before he was hit with the spell. Harry and I dove under the table and had wands out in seconds. Ron toppled out of his chair and we dragged him underneath the table with us. I stood up and disarmed a death eater, but was hit with a hex. Harry was angry and shouted out the killing curse, hitting two death eaters before the room was thrown into darkness. _

_The next thing I remembered waking up in a dark room, lit with moonlight. Harry was next to me along with Ron._

"_Harry!" I whispered urgently, feeling the burning hex on my torso act up. Harry groaned, but was alert in seconds, looking around us._

"_Mione, there's muggles over there!" He said pointing to the other side of the room. I made my way over to them, afraid that they might be dead. Nothing prepared me for what was there._

"_Hermione!" _

"_Daddy?" I whispered in horror and shock. No! This wasn't happening! It wasn't possible. But it was and they were right in front of me._

"_Hermione is that-_

"_My dad and mum. Yes. I want to know how the hell they got here when they were in the safe house." I told him angrily. I couldn't let Harry know how scared I was._

_Mum wasn't awake and there wasn't any blood on her so I assumed she was stunned._

"_Did you just get here daddy?" I asked softly moving closer. He nodded, swallowing thickly. He reached for me and I hugged him tightly._

"_I'm going to wake up mum okay." I told him. _

"_I've tried to but she won't wake!" he said, fear coloring his voice._

"_Magic Daddy. She's been stunned. Harry is Ron awake?" I asked._

"_No but I'll wake him." It was too dark to see anything but the faintish shapes around the room._

"_Ennervate." I whispered and my mum woke up slowly. Muggles didn't react well with Magic. Not at all._

"_Mum, it's okay. Dads right here." I said softly. She didn't say anything but I took her hand._

"_Harry what the bloody hell is going on? We were just in the Hogshead, but why are we-_

"_Ron, shut your mouth. We've been taken. Hermione and he parents are over there so be quite until they're done talking." Harry hissed and I smiled slightly. Ron was one of a kind alright._

"_But-_

"_Shhh!"_

"_Mum, Dad you just need to wait and someone will find us. Harry has a tracking device on him." I explained that it would all be okay, but I knew it wouldn't be. At least not for all of us._

"_Guys-_

_I never finished what I said because at that moment Lucius Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestranges walked in._

"_Well, it seems we meet again, Mudblood." Malfoy said._

"_So it seems, Malfoy." I hissed angrily. My parents were right over there! that's all my mind could focus on._

"_You dare speak to me in that ungrateful tone! Crucio!" _

_The pain hit me much like I expected but it takes a long time to get used this particular curse. A scream ripped from my throat and I felt my teeth tear my lip open in my struggle to stay quite._

"_Well, then it seems that isn't painful enough. I want to hear you scream you filthy mudblood!" _

_Harry was gone and so was Ron. I felt them move away from me and towards my parents. I sighed in relief. I didn't want them hurt._

_The air was suddenly gone from my lungs and no matter how hard I tried to breathe air just wouldn't come. I closed my eyes and chocked and gasped but it never-_

_Air flowed into my body to quickly and stars erupted behind my eyes._

"_You like that? Bella, why don't you finish with her, I have some business with Potter and Weasely."_

"_Of course Lucius. My pleasure. Crucio!" _

_More screams. I waited for it to go away but she was stopping so I tried to speak._

"_You crazy Bitch!" was all that came out in a scream of agony, but I'd shocked her into dropping the curse._

"_What did you just call me?" she demanded dangerously. My head was spinning and I thought I was going to vomit._

"_I called you a crazy bitch, because that's what you are." I spit on her feet, not able to move to my knees. I would have loved to spit in her face._

_She howled in outrage and a kick landed in my gut. The air whooshed out of me and I coughed. She must have broken something, because that really hurt._

"_Bring me the red head." I shut my eyes in defeat. Ron! I heard him swearing and then he fell right next to me._

"_Open your eyes Mudblood." _

_Ron was in a body bind, lying next to me, with a look of outrage on his face._

"_Hi, Ron." I whispered softly and he stared at me for a long time. _

"_Hi, Mione." He answered and I felt water rush through my eyes. This was supposed to happen._

_Spiders. So many spiders were all over him but he wasn't making a sound. They were biting him and he was so brave I couldn't believe it._

"_Crucio!" _

_Ron screamed and he couldn't even move because of the body bind on him. His eyes rolled back into his head and I worried that he was dead. She lifted the curse and leaned down to kiss him on his forehead. Ron flinched._

"_Mummy made it all better!" she said joyfully, like the unhinged woman she was. _

"_Avada Kendavra!"_

_The Ron's eyes went blank. "NOOOOOOOO! Ron! Ron!" I screamed scrambling to my knee unable to believe she had just- he was seventeen years old! I sobbed and shook his body but he wouldn't wake up!_

"_Ron!" I screamed again but then I fell silent. My parents were here. My _parents!_ Oh no!_

_The weight had settled itself in my heart and I felt like I couldn't breathe just right. Ron's lifeless body was lying within touching distance._

"_Harry?" I whispered looking for him, feeling blood dripping from my mouth. The copper taste filled my mouth._

"_I know Hermione. I know." His voice carried across the room and I heard my mum shrieking with worry. Dad was trying to silence her._

"_I'm alright, Mum." I said and she fell silent finally._

"_Mudblood I wasn't ready for her to be quiet!" Lucius hissed and I felt my self being dragged over to him._

"_For you punishment Mudblood you'll have to pick." _

_I knew what he meant right away and I felt my tears increase steadily. I looked up at him with pity._

"_Kill them both." I said. I heard my Mum gasp. Dad said nothing. Malfoy looked surprised but happy._

"_Very well. Avada Kedavra." The first spell hit my mum and she went silent just like Ron. I moved closer to her unable to believe I really just killed my mum. Dad was crying. The weight got heavier._

"_Daddy it'll be okay. I promise." I lied._

"_I love you Hermione. I don't blame you." His voice cracked helplessly._

"_Avada Kedavra." Malfoy hissed again and then Daddy was dead too. Harry and I stared at each in silence. Then Harry lost control; we both did._

_I wasn't sure what I did exactly but one moment both of them were staring at me and then everything blew up._

_I heard Harry scream in rage when he saw Ron's body. I was thinking of the three green lights that were going to plague my memory for the rest of my life. I launched myself at Lucius Malfoy and sank my teeth into his neck. It was the only weapon I had. My magic was to out of control to do wandless magic on command. He screamed and fell to the ground clutching his bleeding neck. Blood was gushing out at a fast pace and saw a knife glinting in the light. I snatched it up and drove it into his cold heart._

_All he made was s gurgling sound and then he was dead. I felt better slightly. Harry was killing Bellatrix._

"_Crucio!" He screamed and then she started screaming. I handed him the knife. He launched it into her gut._

"_Avada Kedavra." Then we were alone. With five dead bodies. I took Malfoy's wand and Harry took Bellarix's. _

"_I can't leave them here, Mione. We're taking them." I knew he meant Ron and my Parents. I was fine with that._

"_I'll get mum and dad." My voice shook and for a second I thought I was faint. I didn't. I put a feather light charm on their bodies and lifted them easily. Harry hovered Ron and we blasted the door open. There wasn't anyone there. It seemed that we were ordered to be killed. Strange. I thought for sure Voldemort would want Harry killed by him only._

_He felt the anti- apparation wards lift. Malfoy or Bellatrix must have put them up. They were dead now._

_We apparated to Headquarters._

_Molly was in the kitchen when we landed. Harry set Ron down on the floor and I did the same with my parents. We just stood there. Waiting. _

"_Harry!" it was me who screamed for him and I felt his arms go around me. We were shaking uncontrollably and there was blood all over us. It hurt all over but all I could see was the bodied of my mum and dad._

"_Mummy! Harry she's…." I couldn't finish anything and just cried until I heard people file into the kitchen._

_Dumbledore entered and took a look around him. I launched myself at him, and almost made it before Harry held me back with arms around my waist. Whatever was broke in my chest ached horribly._

"_YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO KEEP US SAFE YOU BASTARD!" I screamed louder than I thought possible. Remus was standing there. wide eyed. Tonks was 7 months pregnant and looked ready to vomit._

"_They're dead." I said. "Dead."_

"_Where is all that blood from Hermione?" Dumbledore said calmly._

"_Lucius Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestranges." Harry answered his voice dead. Ron was right there at our feet. Molly was standing there holding her apron so tightly I thought her hands might break. I went to Ron and closed his eyes. His eyes were blank! Molly shouldn't see that. Harry stood staring at my father._

"_He made me promise to keep you safe Mione. He said I had to protect his little girl." I looked up at Harry and saw the determination in his eyes._

"_Okay. You can keep me safe." Then I fainted._

* * *

><p>I tore awake from my sleep panting and I could tell I'd been screaming in my sleep. Dumbledore was standing by my bed and so was Minerva. Harry was lying in the next bed. Asleep.<p>

"What?" I demanded, calming myself. My body jerked. The effect of the torture curse. A hiss escaped my lips.

"You aren't well. Either of you. Madam Pince told us what happened she saw everything. Wandless magic. Unbelievable at your age. " it was Minerva that spoke.

"You've said that, but somehow it matters even less the second time around. Get out." I said and got from my bed. My legs were shaking badly. I seemed to have shocked her and then I realized why. We were in the past. I should have realized the moment I saw Dumbledore! So stupid!

"I'm sorry, I forgot where I was. When I was. Harry and I have been to healer. There's nothing to be done. Our problem is in our magical cores which are tied to our emotions. We've been through a war and they haven't been right since. We'll be more careful next time. Harry's just so upset. "I explained softly stroking Harry's hair.

"Ron." He muttered and I froze. "Ron! Ron! No!" He was screaming now. Minerva rushed for Madam Pomfrey but I knew better. I slapped him across the face. He went silent.

"He just needs sleep. Sleep."

We all needed sleep.

* * *

><p>Harry was awake the next morning and we both went to classes. We didn't talk about what happened in the Library and I didn't tell him that I dreamed out our capture again even though I promised I would. We had our first class with Slytherin's today and we were expecting to be bullied. We had Double potions today after charms. Mondays were busy and the schedules had been changed for the Slytherin's.<p>

Harry and I took our seats and waited for professor Slughorn to enter. I watched the kids enter recognizing Remus and Lily in the class. Then I saw someone surprising. Severus Snape. He was still pale and had lank black hair, but it wasn't as messy as it would be as an adult and he was smiling. He was perfect white teeth and it was a nice smile. He caught me staring and sneered in my direction. I guess he wouldn't like me at in point in his lifetime. I looked away and took out my notes. I needed to do well this year. For my newts. That was normal at least.

* * *

><p>AN:Here's chapter four. The next chapter with have more Hermione/Severus. Harry's magic is obviously unstable I hope there isn't any confusion over this chapter. Dumbledore was alive at the time of the capture but died about two months later, according to my story. Enjoy and Review!


	5. Friends

Chapter 5- Friends

Harry and I more or less agreed that pretending the Library incident never happened was the best thing to do. I understood why he lost control and he understood that I had been there to help him. End of story.

Harry had decided to try and outdo me in classes. At first I laughed at him and never thought much of his declaration. He had too much on his mind to focus on his studies the way I did on mine. I was proven wrong when he got a 100 on his charms quiz and I got a 99. I'd forgotten the correct charm used for evaporating large bodies of water. Whatever.

Harry sent me a smug smile and returned to taking notes. All he ever did was take notes and then copy them neatly onto new pieces of parchment later. I used to do that but the hand cramps were too much.

We were in the room of requirement when we heard the first crash. Harry and I looked up from our text books and saw the walls of the room shaking. Someone was trying to get in. Harry stood, not needing to grab his wand.

"Were you ever followed." He asked tonelessly. I hated that voice but shook my head. I always made sure I wasn't followed when we came back to this room. We didn't want awkward questions.

Another crash came and Harry stood to wait. I was sitting in my seat and was tempted to just go back to reading. I watched the ceiling shake and looked back to the door. It burst open and Remus Lupin stumbled in.

"Remus? What the bloody hell are you doing?" I scolded stepping in front of Harry. I didn't need to though because Harry was already turning back to his text book and acting as if nothing had ever happened. I scowled at him.

"Hermione! I- what are you doing in here together? I thought James said you weren't a couple!" that was the only thing he asked?

I sneered at him angrily, "We aren't. This is our room. Why are you breaking in?"

Remus flushed and scratched the back of his neck. "I wanted to be alone to study where Sirius couldn't find me. James is with Lily. I was bored!" he defended himself. I relaxed and took a deep breath.

"Well that's what we're doing. Take a seat." I closed the door, after making sure my wand was in my hand, and sat down in my seat. Remus stood frozen for a moment before taking a seat next to Harry and we continued studying in silence. It was the nicest thing that had happened for a while. I always felt better with Remus around.

Harry wasn't feeling well today. He said something about a headache, but I think he just wanted to get ahead on his essays. I didn't argue with him and let him stay in our room, sleeping. It was a lonely walk to charms class and maybe it was because Harry wasn't with me, but I was stared at more than usual. A seventh year Hufflepuff even offered to walk me to class. I declined politely, but I was flattered. When he came back after charms I was a little uneasy. I didn't like this much attention. I would ask Harry to not miss classes again just to try and beat me. I was feeling good about my work in charms class as I walked to Potions without Harry. It was as we expected. The Slytherin's hated us, even though we were nothing but polite to them.

"Where's your boyfriend Granger?" I jumped in my seat and turned to face Severus Snape. He was sneering down at me and his friend….Lucius Malfoy was sitting next to him. Against my better judgment, I smiled showing all my teeth. I was thinking about what was going to happen to him. What I was going to do to him. Lucius frowned at me and shrugged. I kept staring at him, waiting for the rage and…something to burst out of me. This was the first time I had ever looked directly at Malfoy. I avoided his gaze at all cost until now. I wasn't angry when I looked at him. The murderer of my parents. He was the man I killed with my bare hands. It never came and I looked back to Snape. He was staring at me with a strange expression on his face.

"Harry isn't my boyfriend. I don't have one and I don't want one. Just leave me alone." I snapped and turned around in my seat.

But he didn't leave me alone for the entire class. He kept throwing things at me and talking about me loudly to Malfoy next to him.

"I bet she's a whore! Look at her school uniform." That was Malfoy who said it. I turned slowly in my seat.

"The only whore in this room is Bellatrix Lestranges." I said coldly. Malfoy stared at me in shock and then he smiled.

"She's right Severus. Bella is a whore. Even you've had her and you're the pickiest of us all!"

That was more information that I ever needed, but I felt bad for Snape. He would have noticed how crazy she was. Mentally crazy in the extreme.

"Lucius I think you've been confounded. I haven't touched that thing in my life. Never will." Snape snarled looking disgusted at the suggestion. I thought he was telling the truth.

"Are you three done interrupting my class?" I looked back at Professor Slughorn who was staring at us with a stern look on his face.

"Professor we were just talking about the lesson. Sorry for the disturbance." Snape said smoothly and the lesson continued.

When the class was dismissed I collected my things, turned in my potion, and headed for the door. I didn't see a foot stretch into my path and I stumbled, dropping my things. I looked over at Malfoy who had done it. I turned to look at him and the anger I'd been waiting for broke through. We were alone in the classroom now. One second he was sitting on a desk and the next he was flying into the ceiling before falling back to the ground in a heap.

"Do not come near me you useless prick." I snapped, obviously unable to call him the monster he really was. A murderer.

He reached for his wand and sent a hex at me, but his head was spinning and his aim was off. He struggled to his feet and I waited for his next try. I almost hoped Harry would kill him. I wouldn't mind doing it myself. Then I realized what I was doing. I should have played the innocent school girl. I had no knowledge of Malfoy here. He could have accidently tripped me. I took a deep breath and grabbed my bag, only to be roughly spun around with strong hands on my shoulders. He was furious.

"Crucio!"

I hadn't expected it. I never thought he would try and hurt me. He was seventeen! What about the wards for dark magic! My shock made the pain come slower and I didn't scream. I just twitched and thrashed on the ground until he was done.

"Mudblood bitch, you don't know who you're messing with." He brought his foot down on my arm, shattering it. I still didn't make a sound. I was in too much shock. I hadn't felt this much pain since our capture. I used my functioning right arm and stunned him. He didn't know I had used wandless magic on him. Why would he risk using such a dark curse in a school where it would be detected?

Unless those wards hadn't been put up yet. It was 1977 and Voldemort wasn't well known for torturing people. Maybe Dumbledore hadn't thought to put these types of wards up? It still seemed unlikely and I took a deep breath before getting to my feet. My arm was screaming with pain. I left my bag and tried to remember which was closer. The infirmary or Harry.

"Granger? What the hell is going on in here?" It was Snape. My mind was clouded with pain and a shock of the curse hit me again. I fell to my knees, cursing my body for betraying me. Stupid aftershocks!

I opened my eyes and saw Malfoy stirring. I kicked him hard in the face, breaking his nose, but he was out cold. Snape was staring at me, I could feel it. I turned to him, waiting for him to do something. He took out his wand and pointed it at me. I felt a burning sensation in my arm. He was healing me. why was he-

"Malfoy had it coming." He said softly and handed me my bag. I took it feeling looking at him in awe.

"If you hadn't come-

"You don't need to thank me-

We fell silent. "I meant to say if you hadn't come I would have killed the bastard. I hardly think I should thank you." I finished.

He flushed, and for some odd reason I found it attractive. I brought my hand to my lips, feeling the rip. I'd busted it open, again.

"He used the pain curse on you?" Snape asked in awe. I nodded stunned, and another after shock hit me. I didn't fall this time but it still hurt. Professor Slughorn wouldn't have potions for this. Damn it. I wished I was in my own time, so I could sneak into Snape's potion supply and steal it. He always had some. I frowned at the younger Snape in front of me.

"I need to rest. The curse won't wear off for a while." I told him and then cursed my own stupidity. How was I supposed to explain how I knew that? Snape just nodded and watched me leave. I paused and pointed my wand at Malfoy.

"_Oblivate."_

Snape said nothing as I left.

* * *

><p>Harry was waiting for me when I got to our room. So was Remus. I don't know what I was thinking, but Remus always helped me when I had aftershocks like this. He would make me tea and tell me everything was going to be okay.<p>

I collapsed into his arms, Harry in my line of sight.

"Lucius. I oblivated him, though. Stupid death eater." I hissed at the pain. My head was throbbing, Remus was hyperventilating, and Harry was furious.

"It's okay Mione. You're fine. Everything is going to be okay." Harry whispered, just like Remus used to. I started crying. It was so confusing being held by Remus, but knowing he was dead. I cried myself to sleep, forgetting about Snape completely.

When I woke up, Remus was still there talking in whispers with Harry on the other side of the room. My whole body ached in a familiar way.

"Remus, it's a long, sad story. I don't want to tell it. Isn't it enough that I explained we're from a different time? Why are you being so stubborn?" Harry hissed in a soft voice so I wouldn't wake.

Remus was silent for a moment. "Because I want to know why you both are the way you are. You aren't like normal teenagers. You aren't like Sirius or James. You're different."

I swallowed sharply. That's all Remus wanted. Someone different like him. I sat up silently, they didn't notice.

"Remus, James and Sirius aren't going to suddenly change into smart mature teenagers. You're different just like me and Hermione. I'm not here to change things. I'm sorry." Harry did sound sorry, but I wasn't worried about Harry, I was worried about Remus.

I walked over to them and they finally noticed. Harry didn't ask if I was alright. He knew I wasn't.

"Hermione! Are you feeling better? Lucius can be a real prick." It was such a sweet thing to say and I just smiled.

"No, I'm not okay. It won't stop hurting for a very long time Remus. You don't need to worry about that. Ask question we'll answer them. Right Harry?"

Harry scowled. "Fine, you're lucky you're Hermione's best friend." He muttered so softly Remus wouldn't have heard if hadn't been a werewolf.

"okay. What did Lucius really do to you? Do you know him in the future?"

"Yes, but he's dead in the future now. He tortured me in this time and in my time."

Remus paled just a bit, "Do you know what I am?"

"I was the first to find out! You become our Defense teacher for a year. I figured that out within two months." I said, smiling. It had been so obvious to me even in my third year.

Remus looked stunned, "I become a teacher?"

I shook my head, "You just teach us for one year then you quit. You had other work to do."

He shook his brown hair out of his face and blinked a few times, to gather his thoughts.

"Do lily and James marry? I have to know."

Harry answered, "Yes. They do. You and Sirius are at the wedding." Harry's eyes looked very sad for moment.

"You have lily's eyes." Remus stated, a sudden look of recognition appeared on his face.

"I would imagine so. I'm her son." I laughed when Harry said that.

"You're….James! but- Her son!" Remus sputtered. I just laughed harder. Harry looked at me with surprise. I calmed myself, and looked away from his gaze.

"Your laugh….it sounds…not right." Remus said. I nodded. I knew that.

Remus spent another hour or so asking questions and making jokes about the wedding and small bits of our life that were happy. Before seventh year, we had a mostly happy life. No big mass murders or killing. Sirius died, but Harry had only known him for a very short time. His death didn't hurt as much as the others.

After Remus was gone, and after swearing a wizard's oath to keep our secrets; Harry pulled me into a hug. I was pleasantly surprised and let him squeeze me to death for a few moments.

"I'm glad you're all right, but tell me who helped you."

I stiffened. "I won't let you say one word to him Harry. It was Snape. He healed my arm and let me Oblivate Malfoy. Oh he also didn't stop me from breaking Malfoy's nose. It should be pleasantly crooked now."

"Well, I suppose it was good he came and not someone else. Just stay away from him from now on. He's no good, hero or not. He'll always be a bastard. A mean sarcastic one." Harry joked. We spent the rest of the evening studying and finishing our Transfiguration essays that were due tomorrow.

* * *

><p>Harry was in a good mood the next morning. At first I thought he'd just slept well, but when he greeted Sirius and Remus brightly, and completely ignored his father I knew something was different.<p>

I didn't get the chance to ask him about it before he was whisked away by Sirius. I frowned at them, wondering what they were planning.

"He's trying to find Harry a girlfriend."

I froze and looked at Remus with wide eyes. "A girlfriend?" I repeated in awe. Harry having a girlfriend.

"I don't know how I feel about that." I said at last. Remus looked smug and I glared at him.

"Not because I want him for myself." I snapped, erasing his smug look. "I don't know if he's ready for that. If either of us are. He's very protective of me, you know. How would a girlfriend react to that? I feel bad about this, but Harry's an adult. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to date someone."

Remus nodded as I spoke but I had a feeling he didn't agree.

Harry wasn't in Transfiguration. Remus and Lilly sat in their usual seats, right next to each, but Harry had yet to show up. He was probably still with Sirius. He wouldn't purposely worry me by just skipping class. Class would start in five minutes. Harry had plenty of time. He really shouldn't miss two days of class! I sighed and tapped my quill impatiently. Remus was staring at me; I could feel his eyes heating up my back.

"What, Remus?" I asked softly. I heard Lily gasp. I turned around and saw Lily gaping at me like a fish. She still looked beautiful doing it.

"Harry is with Sirius. I wasn't supposed to tell you, but well. It's different. They're fine though. It's not like they can do anything horribly wrong, besides skipping." Remus flushed, avoiding Lily's curious gaze.

"About that Remus, what do you know about the dark magic wards around the school? The ones that detect it?" Remus looked incredulous. Lily was staring at me strangely. That gave me my answer.

"There aren't any. But I suppose there should be." He muttered, as if he had never thought of such a thing.

Harry never came to class. I knew that he wouldn't, but I had that little voice constantly wondering where he was. Harry was probably just having fun. The seat next to me was empty until Snape decided to take it. I stared at him.

"What do you want?" I asked. I wasn't in the mood for his sarcasm. He just raised one eyebrow and looked back to the lesson. I smiled tightly, frustrated. I really didn't know what to do with Severus Snape.

"We're partners." He whispered in my ear softly. I didn't flinch away. I should have though. I nodded silently, looking put out. I shouldn't want to be his partner. I didn't want to be his partner.

We each took turns transfiguring this and that. It was pretty clear that we knew the spell perfectly.

"You're good. How did you get so good?" He asked skeptically. I smiled and shook my head.

"I practice and I'm a brilliant student."

"Modesty. I like it." He said in a deeper voice. I wasn't sure what was happening. Why was he being civil?

"You kicked Malfoy in the face and broke his nose without flinching. I've wanted to do that for _years._"

Ahh, that explained his obsession, or curiosity. Whatever his problem was.

"Well, I'm glad to be of service." I looked anxiously at the clock and saw we still had twenty minutes left in class.

"What did he do to make you so angry?" Snape asked suddenly, looking a little lost.

"He tripped me." Now the explanation really did seem foolish.

Snape rolled his black eyes, "Right. The torture had nothing to do with it."

I was surprised, but not that much. He was going to be a death eater. He would recognize that curse.

A cold breeze came into the room and I saw people shivering. I frowned, waiting. A burst of coldness and then the room shook. I was out of my seat in an instant, distantly hearing the Professor telling Snape to follow me.

I ran as fast as I could, following the cold through the castle. I could recognize Harry's magic anywhere.

I found Harry lying flat on his back, having fainted again. This was horrible. That was twice since we've been here that he lost control. I looked for Sirius.

"Sirius, come out right now." A black, hurt dog limped towards me. I held back a whimper. Of course Sirius would plan to show this to a new best mate. Of course Harry would….

Oh dear.

"Change back. Now."

He fell to his knee, coughing. He looked bruised all over. "What did you say to him?" I demanded grabbing him by his school robes. Sirius looked shocked at my behavior but answered me.

"I told him it took James and me three years to do this and he shouldn't worry about it taking too long. I was going to teach him." He paused to groan in pain. I looked down at his side and ripped his school robes open. He had a twig launched into his side. It wasn't in deep enough to harm him, but I bet it hurt.

"Continue." I muttered staring at the injury. It would scar.

"He went real quiet. I asked him if he was okay."

"Word for word what did you say!" I snapped.

"I said, Harry, you know you can tell me anything!" I dropped his roughly, without healing him.

"Harry isn't well, Sirius. I'm sorry you had to see this." I contemplated oblivating him but Remus and James both would ask how this morning went.

"When James, Remus or anyone asks how this morning went you'll say it was great and that nothing out of the ordinary happened. Got it?"

I bent down and yanked the twig out of his side, frowning when he howled in pain.

"Such a baby." I muttered and healed the wound over. I levitated Harry and was going to walk back to our rooms, when I spotted Snape hiding in a corner, staring at me wide eyed. Shit.

"Snape-

He shook his head and motioned for us to move. I left Sirius there, panting with pain. He was such wimp. It was a three inch twig!

"You're amazing." I stopped walking and looked at Snape. I must have heard him wrong.

"I mean it. You know what you want and you just take it. This is the second time I've seen it. Have you always been like this?"

I thought about oblivating him, but what good would that do. I'd be alone. With Harry. Like I have been for the last year and a half.

"No, I haven't always been like this." I whispered and continued walking. Harry need to rest peacefully in our rooms. I let Snape follow me.

"You don't stay with the Gryffindors?" He asked curiously.

"No, Harry and I aren't just transfer students. We wanted privacy. But we aren't together like that. He's basically my brother."

He didn't ask for the life story! I berate myself. What was I thinking?

"I never thought you were together. It was more like brother and sister to me. I bet you've been friends for years."

"8 years." I muttered and settled Harry onto his bed. He doesn't move a muscle.

"Harry has random outbursts of magic when he gets to emotional. Like today. And the other day in the library."

My mouth won't stop so I turn away from Snape, drawing in a deep calming breath.

"Snape-

"Severus. My name is Severus." He interrupts, moving closer.

"Severus." His name feels foreign on my tongue and a shiver rolls down my spine.

"I'll see you tomorrow." I finally say in the silence. He nods and hands me my bag. I didn't even notice he had it.

"Thank you."

He nods again, deep in thought.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Hermione."

He leaves before my mind can catch up. I should have oblivated him or made him swear an oath. What was I thinking, telling him all that! My mind races but soon I'm too tired to think about homework, the future, or even the present. I only think of Severus and how he'll mess everything up.

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><p>AN: Thanks for all the reviews last chapter! So, Remus knows the big secret, Sirius is confused and Hermione thinks Severus is more than a stupid Slytherin. Reviews are welcome!


	6. Approval

Chapter 6- Approval

I didn't know what to do with myself. Hermione was afraid of my magic, hell I was afraid too. I just couldn't control it. I feel so helpless. I practically have my own bed reserved in the Infirmary. I haven't heard from Albus, but I'm sure he'll be here soon. I just hope he doesn't decide I'm too dangerous to have at school.

Hermione came to see me a few times today, but I could tell she was distracted. She seemed detached and I could only assume she was upset with me. I went six whole months after the war without any magical outburst. Then when we come here it's seems like it's happening every bloody day! Hermione brought me my assignments, which I already had done, and made some excuse about a speech at dinner tonight. I knew she was lying, but didn't call her on it. If she wanted a secret she could have one, for now anyway.

I was curious. What could she be hiding? I knew she didn't have a time turner, she wasn't stupid. What else would she keep from me? Maybe she had another run in with Malfoy?

I shook my head; we both had secrets these days. Mine was Bellatrix Lestranges. I didn't know what I was doing. It was the day I told Mione I wasn't feeling well enough to go to class, the same day Remus found out about us. I went to lunch late, so I wouldn't run into Mione.

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><p><em>Bellatrix was sitting by herself and I was just staring at her. She looked up and smiled at me evilly. Not evilly, but slyly as if she had a secret. Later on I realized she was flirting with me. Instead of turning away in disgust as I should have, I smiled back just as slyly. I didn't know what I was doing! She followed me back after lunch; I saw her immediately, but let her follow. I was fascinated by her. Apart from the underlying rage I felt every time I looked at her, I felt a deep curiosity and will to understand her. She seemed innocent enough at seventeen years old. She was even smart enough in her classes. She was a whore, no denying it, but I didn't get that malicious, evilness from her. Her adult self was mentally ill, something twisted and just wrong. <em>

_I stopped before I got to close to my room. I didn't need Mione to find out about this._

"_It's Harry, right? That's a lovely name." She had purred, literally like a cat. It didn't have the desired effect on me. It wasn't as if I could ever truly be attracted to a monster like her. She was sinfully beautiful, in a slutty way. I still hadn't turned around to face her. She was suddenly pressed right up against my back. I could feel her breast moving in pace with her breathing. She wound her arms around me and whispered in my ear. I didn't stop her. I felt a horrible shudder of disgust run through me as I pictured that day I killed the girl standing right behind me._

_I spun around and gripped her shoulders roughly. She laughed. That's what got me the most, is that it was a real laugh and not a twisted evil one. She was almost human to me. Her curly black hair was touching my forearms, and I stared at it, frowning. What was I doing! _

_I didn't stop her though when she leaned up and pressed her surprisingly warm lips against mine. I pulled in a breath and pressed my lips against hers harder than I would have if I was kissing a girl I liked. Right now I was kissing a girl I hated with a passion. And I really was kissing her. Somehow I tangled my hand in her hair, yanking on it painfully, while she masterfully opened her mouth against mine. A thud reached my ears and I realized it was me throwing her against the wall of the hallway. Her back arched, pressing her closer to me. I still wasn't attracted to her. I didn't have any urge to rip her clothes off and have my way with her, but I was angry. I could tell I was hurting her and I bit down savagely on her lips, hearing a whimper escape from her. I could taste the blood that was running over our mouths. _

_I tore my mouth away from her, out of breath. She had a glazed over look in her eyes, and blood was running down her chin and neck. Her chest was heaving, seductively. I still didn't want her. _

"_I knew you were bad. I just knew it." She breathed, licking the blood off her lips. There was the manic I knew. What normal girl would like to have their lip torn open?_

_I didn't say anything; I just stared at her, wondering what she would do next. She smiled, showing all her teeth and walked closer to me, though I'd only take two steps back._

"_Do that again." She said, eyeing me lustfully. And I did._

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><p>I shook my head, snapping myself out of the disturbing image. I really didn't want her that way, but she wanted me and I got a strange satisfaction out of knowing that. That happened about a week ago and I hadn't told anyone.<p>

I wanted out of this bed.

I summoned my clothes and dressed silently. I didn't need Madam Pomfrey yelling at me for trying to leave. Hermione was probably studying in the Library, since she didn't have classes to day. I made my way there silently, ignoring the other students roaming the castle.

"So, your girl? She's with Snape now?" I looked around for the voice and spotted her two feet in front of me. She had her arms crossed with an expectant look on her face. I frowned; Hermione had mentioned Snape helped her with Malfoy, bit as far as I knew she didn't speak to him.

"I don't know what you're talking about. Get out of my way." I said coldly, but she wasn't fazed and took my hand, tightly.

"I'll show you what I'm talking about." She said, pulling me to the library. I let her, curious. What was Mione doing?

"You're not to be seen." I told her sharply pushing her behind a book shelf as I took in the scene before me.

Hermione was sitting, not in a chair, but on a table, leaning back resting on her palms. Her feet swung idly as she concentrated on Severus Snape. He was sitting in her usually chair, reading from a book, pausing to let her say something. He smiled at her and looked away from her face to her thigh, which was visible because of the way she was sitting. I narrowed my eyes at him. He quickly returned to the book and I looked at Mione's face. She looked peaceful and in awe. She kept glancing down at Snape, as if to make sure he was still there.

He said something I didn't hear and she laughed her old laugh. Not the fake, horrible sounding one I was used too these days. Her head fell back and one hand was holding her stomach as she laughed at what he said. Somehow I doubted it was that funny.

Having seen enough I went back to where I'd left Bella. Bella. It was strange to call her that, but everyone did.

She was smirking triumphantly. I didn't really see the big deal. I wasn't in any position to judge Hermione for this. Besides I really doubted she was shagging him. They were just friends from what I could tell, though Snape obviously had his eyes on more.

"I don't see what you meant. I see friendship not lust. I doubt they're together." I said tonelessly. I was only ever angry or cold towards her. I still didn't understand why she sought me out. She placed a hand on my chest, running her fingers up and down. My heart didn't race or skip a beat. I just looked at her, wondering why I was doing this to myself. She made me remember things I would rather forget.

She kissed my jaw, moving to my neck. I sighed deeply, preparing myself. This felt like the opposite of lust. She bit down on my neck, but I only made the smallest sound. There would be another mark to cover up. I was shit at healing spell on hickeys. Ginny had tried to teach me but it never worked. More glamours for me.

I pushed her away harshly, glaring. She just smiled and pulled my arms around her waist. I dragged her against me roughly.

"Not here." I said, remembering Hermione was just around the corner with Snape. Her eyes lit up and she led the way out of the Library. I didn't ask where we were going, and just let her lead. Hermione was busy so I could be with her for now. That cold feeling I always got when I was around Bella intensified as we entered to astronomy tower, which was empty. We were completely alone. She locked the door and turned to me.

"What are we doing?" she demanded. I shrugged. It wasn't like I had an answer. She nodded.

"We're doing nothing. Nothing at all." She told me firmly and shoved me into the cold stone behind me. She was nothing if not passionate. I wondered where that passion came from. Why did she want me? She got down on her knees, but I wasn't having that and went down with her.

"No." I said simply and she nodded, pulling my body on top of hers. Her hand sneaked under my shirt and down my back, touching the bare skin. My heart did race and it did skip a beat.

I kissed her back roughly, pulling her shirt up and over her head. She didn't protest, but seemed angry. I was furious with her and myself and at the whole dame world for doing this to me.

She pulled my shirt off, rolling us so she was seated on my hips. She was wearing a black plain bra and it wasn't her breast that caught my attention. It was her eyes. I have never noticed before but they were green. Like mine, only more innocent. How can a whore be innocent? Well, I bet she hasn't tortured or murdered anyone.

It was so easy to let my anger towards her, and everyone turn to lust. It consumed me and I let it.

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><p>Hermione's Pov<p>

Harry wasn't in the hospital wing. Madam Pomfrey told me he left this morning and she didn't care about finding him. I wanted to talk to him though. We hadn't seen Dumbledore in a month and I wanted to see if there had been any developments in our potion to send up home. He wasn't in our room and I thought something had happened to him.

I reached the court yard and sat down, dejected. I heard an echoed thud. I looked up and in the Astronomy tower I saw two people kissing. I didn't recognize them, but it looked pretty intense. I watched in shock as they guy practically yanked her hair off and bit into her neck. I felt my stomach turn. Who could like things like that!

I hurried back inside, deeply disturbed.

My thoughts turned to Severus. He was more than I had ever thought. He listened and understood everything I said. I didn't have to rephrase constantly, because my vocabulary was larger than his. He was just as smart, if not smarter, than me. It was delightful I only wished I knew this side of him in our time. He was just a sarcastic bastard in my time. Though he was sarcastic in any time he wasn't a bastard to me. He was nice and Merlin forbid, sweet.

I went to my room, intent on studying and maybe a nap, since all my homework was done earlier in the library. I flopped down onto my bed, snuggling into my soft pillows and blankets. I hoped Harry would come back soon.

I woke sometime later and saw Harry sitting there staring at me. He looked more lost than I had ever seen him.

His appearance was what worried me. He had blood trickling from a wound on his neck and his lip was busted. I saw his entire neck covered in bruises, hickeys. I frowned and flushed a little. Couldn't he have covered them up!

"Harry- I you- have…." I couldn't finish and he just nodded. He pulled his rumpled shirt over his head. I felt my eyes widened, not because his toned body did anything for me, but because his back had one large bruise in the middle and what looked like two sets of nails. The scratched started at his shoulder blades and ended somewhere underneath his pants. They were bleeding slightly. His chest was covered in bruises. I saw his angled hips had fingertip shaped purple markings on them.

"Mione, I think I've made a huge mistake." Harry whispered softly, looking scared.

"Harry what happened?"

I was so confused. It almost looked like he had just-

"Bellatrix Lestranges happened." He muttered darkly. I gaped at him.

"She did this to you? OH my God! Harry what were you-

"I don't _know!" _ He screamed, his fingers knotting in his hair. He looked deranged. I took a breath.

"Tell me what happened."

He shook his head. "I can't. Just look. Look for yourself."

I was about to protest, but he looked so lost and confused. I nodded and got up from my bed.

"_Legilimens!"_

It was more than I ever thought Harry could feel at once. I felt the anger, pain, and distant lust. Images started coming as Harry relaxed.

The fierce kisses, the coldness towards her. The satisfaction of owning her as he went inside her- then the feeling of regret, that he shouldn't have done any of it no matter how deserving she was. The feeling he had when he said her name, Bella, like she was a real person, and more sickness that he could even stand to touch her. A whore.

I broke the connection, reeling. I sat down next to Harry. I was speechless.

"I messed up." He whispered sorrowfully. I nodded, "Yes you did, but after being in your mind, I understand. I do. I felt the same anger toward Malfoy, and yours just turned to lust because you saw she wanted you. It's okay Harry. It really is."

I stiffened suddenly, "That was you on the astronomy tower earlier. My god Harry!"

The image of him sinking his teeth into her neck popped into my mind. My eyes darted to his neck wound again.

"Yes, that was me. I still can't-

He broke off flushing a deep red. His eyes watered up and he put his head in his hands, shoulders shaking.

"She killed Ron!" he said, his voice furious. I nodded, remembering it more vividly than Harry.

"I know, but I think that's why this happened, Harry. She doesn't matter to you. You don't care about her. She's nothing. Just try and forget it ever happened." I assured him. I was afraid to hug him with all the wounds.

"Will you heal yourself? The scratched are giving me horrible images." I said with a gagging noise. Harry's smiled returned for a minute.

"Thanks Mione. Now, I have something else to tell you. I saw you and Snape today."

I flushed and stood,"Harry!"

"No, Mione I'm not mad, I just wanted you to know you didn't have to hide. I don't really have room to talk do I?"

I relaxed, my anger disappearing.

"Well, heal up. We have Defense tomorrow. You'll need all your strength to beat me."

Harry snorted and vanished into the bathroom. I sank onto the bed, exhausted. Harry really had me worried and I was still having trouble stomaching seeing him having sex.

I shuddered and went to make sure my bag was packed for class tomorrow. It never hurt to be prepared.

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><p>AN: Okay, an intense chapter. I want to make it clear though that Harry is in no way ever going to fall in love with Bellatrix. He's using her. anyway, I hope you guys like the chapter and quick update. More Severus/Hermione with the next update. I love your reviews!


	7. Future

Chapter 7- Future

**Present day**

Severus Snape stalked down the hall, furious beyond belief. What the hell was happening to me, he thought savagely and with a hint of fear. He made his way up the winding staircase, which would lead to Headmistress McGonagall. Or Minerva as he called her.

The door swung open before he could knock. He strode into the room, hands shaking slightly.

"_What in the name of Merlin is going on here!" _He hissed sharply, his control on his emotions breaking. Minerva wasn't moved by the display, but amused.

"Surely you can see what's happened. Something wondrous." She said, eying him in a knowing fashion. Severus blanched, fearing her next words.

"I refuse to believe it. I would never- a student!"

Minerva frowned, peering at him intently. "Severus, you can hardly control it. You're both teenagers there, though I do wonder what she is thinking sometimes."

Severus was used to the disbelieving looks and whispers he received concerning his love life, or there lack of. True he had not been with a woman in many years, but he had relationships before. Ones that lasted 6 or seven months. Actual relationships.

But this farce with Miss Granger….Miss Hermione Granger deserved all those looks. Every single one.

Minerva continued, not noticing Severus' internal dialogue. "She must see what a catch you are, though I wonder why she is so protective of Harry. I can see that myself in the memories. One day they weren't there and then they were. She always knows where he is, and she really dislikes Albus. Harry was almost completely disrespectful. My gosh, the way he spoke to Miss Granger. It was as if she were his child sneaking cookies before dinner!" Minerva said, slightly appalled at her student's behavior.

"We never got the details of what happened during their capture. Two days they were gone and came back with three dead bodies and covered in blood, claiming to have killed their captors. I sensed there was much more to the whole thing, but who was I to ask." Severus said; glad to have the subject change from his…attractiveness.

Minerva stared at her friend that she had known since he was eleven years old. "They refused to speak of it. Harry more so than Miss Granger. She mostly cried and argued, whilst Harry flat out told everyone to-

"Fuck off. Yes I was there Minerva." Severus hissed, hating the feeling he had of unease when he remembered the days following their return.

Minerva didn't scold him for his language. She wasn't his mother, unfortunately. He would have made her proud, he does so anyway.

"Yes, but do you really think they murdered people. Hermione and Harry?" She asked skeptically.

Severus didn't hesitate to answer, "They did. Brutally." He winced, wishing he had left out the last part.

Minerva looked disturbed, "They spoke to you?"

Severus scoffed, "Hardly, but I'm a murderer myself, Minerva. I know the look in a person's face when they've ended a life. It's hard to miss for a man like myself."

A wave of sorrow hit the headmistress. How unfair this world was to the past few generations. So much lost.

"Well how is he fairing?" Minerva asked at last, willing the dread in her stomach away. She didn't need to think of such things.

"I'd say it's lucky he isn't mentally insane. I've brewed his potion, but I doubt he'll need it. All the test say he's pure wizard. He doesn't speak much. Sentences every few days. He hasn't said anything of memories to me and hasn't asked what happened to him. Poppy is out of her mind with worry. She says he could very well never be the man he was."

Minerva took this in, "Remus is a wonderful man. Brave. He'll make it, though I don't have any answers. He just appeared in the Infirmary, you say?"

He nodded, "Yes. One minute I'm alone and then he standing there, pale as a ghost but obviously alive. How does a man go from being dead and six feet under to standing in front of me breathing?"

Minerva didn't have an answer to that. No one did.

* * *

><p>1977- Hermione's POV<p>

Harry never brought up Bellatrix Lestranges and I couldn't bring myself to either. I had something else on my mind entirely. One, Severus Snape. Sometime I would catch myself staring at him in class, and he would catch me as well and I would flush. He would smirk and wink at me. It was all in good fun, right?

I feared it wasn't. What could I do? The Severus Snape I knew in my time would die before touching me, but the one here obviously wanted me. Dare I say it, I wanted him too.

It was just the way he was so passionate about everything around him. Whether it is Potions, charms, this theory, or that belief; I couldn't help but wonder how It would feel to be held in that light. That _passion._

I could dream about it day and night, but couldn't explain why it was worth it. When I went home it would have been for nothing. Nothing at all. So I only went along with his flirtatious banter to feel good about myself. It wasn't as if anything could ever come of a relationship between us. It was laughable. Severus met with me every day in the Library, to study, but we mostly talked, a few lingering touches there, a few sultry glances there. I told myself it wasn't there, that it wasn't real.

But how could it not be when it was _right there in front of me!_ I wanted to kiss the man silly, but I was living a lie here. This was the young Severus Snape and he knew nothing of my faults. Yes he knew I could stomp on a man's face without hesitation and that I could withstand pain, but a murderer and a torturer? Who would accept that? I assumed he himself wasn't either of those things yet.

I felt my face flush with frustration. I was on my way to the Library, to meet Severus. He was being teased constantly, but he never batted an eye at his bullies, only having eyes for me and laughing at them as if they were on the outside of some huge joke. In a way everyone was.

I went to my table and flopped onto the desk. I had basically given up my chair for Severus and spent my time sitting out our table, swinging my legs. It was relaxing and I…kind of liked how he stared at my legs for minutes on end. It was flattering and I liked that feeling a lot. Almost powerful. It had been a long time since I felt anything besides magical power.

I never thought I would crush on any boy again. I thought there was only so much pain a heart could take until it stopped working. Apparently not.

I rested on head back on the desk, lying flat on my back, still swinging my legs. I folded my arms over my stomach, breathing deeply.

Harry had approved of my friendship with Severus, almost encouraged it. No matter how appalled I was at his behavior with Bellatrix, his opinion still mattered to me, more than anyone's.

I closed my eyes for a moment, feeling just how tired I really was. Sometimes it just catches up with me when I don't expect it.

I opened my eyes and gasp when I see Severus' face hovering just mere centimeters from my face.

My heart races and I wait for whatever he's doing.

"What are you doing sleeping on a table? Wont it hurt your back?" he said, raising an eyebrow to tell me he thought I was crazy. I laughed nervously and sighed in relief and …disappointment. Yes that's what I'm feeling and it really stings.

I close my eyes again, blocking out his strangely startling eyes, "So? Where am I supposed to sleep in a Library anyway? On the books?"

He smirked, I didn't see it because my eyes were closed, but I could just_ feel_ it.

"I think there's a rule about sleeping in here. You shouldn't do it." He warned, mockingly.

"I'll believe it when I see it, Severus." I hear him get up, his chair, or rather my chair, making that squeaky noise.

He comes back moments later, laying a piece of paper directly on my face, and I inhale it. It smells like ink.

I opened my eyes and look at it. It's a list of the rules in the Library. No sleeping is number three. I looked over at Severus who's almost laughing at me.

"I wonder when they made that rule?" I mutter, obviously knowing I wasn't supposed to sleep in the Library. I practically lived there in my time, not to mention this time.

"Hermione, I think its common sense." He laughed lightly.

"Well someone had to do it for it to become a rule. And number three no less." I argued, finally sitting up.

He eyes followed me with precision and he flushed. I looked down at myself and saw that my shirt had lifted and my skirt had hiked up a few inches. He can now obviously see my naval and outer thighs.

And I liked it.

Severus keeps staring almost as if he's in a trance. I almost kiss him then, but for some reason I want him to do that. For six weeks I've wanted him to do something because I want him so badly and how can he not notice? I shift on the table, drawing his attention to my face.

"So, any homework to do?" he asked brightly. I shook my head, perplexed. He was so difficult. He frowned.

"Then why did we meet today?" he asked curiously.

"Because I wanted to see you and we don't always need homework to be together Severus." I snapped, sliding forward about to hop off the desk. He gripped my wrist gently, stopping me. He's distracted by my newly shone skin.

"Stop ogling me!" I snapped pulling away from him. I'm not really angry, but frustrated. Boys.

He flushes and grabbed his things. "Fine, I'll leave."

I pushed him back down onto his seat roughly. "Like hell you will." I snarled, but I hesitated.

"Why are we even doing anything together anymore if you're only here to do homework? I'm just as smart as you, I don't need help."

He flinched, but I don't really care. "I could ask you the same thing." He countered.

"Because I enjoy your sarcastic, witty company. I guess that was my mistake, wasn't it."

His eyes light up in a way I've come to love and relish in. It's like I'm the sun he's seeing for the first time.

"No, I just… I don't know Hermione. I'm confused." He's not going to say it. He won't say anything. My hope disintegrates, turning to ash.

"Goodbye, Snape." I said expressionlessly. He's surprised by my behavior. I ignored him and hurriedly grabbed my bag. I almost allow myself to hope he'll come after me. But that's ridiculous. He doesn't care. I don't know how I let my self be deluded into thinking he did.

I take two deep breaths once I'm outside the Library. A cold feeling settles into my bones. I've lost a best friend before, but somehow even though he's alive in the next room, makes it hurt just as badly.

I walked purposely to my room, refusing to see if he's behind me. My whole body wishes he were.

"Hermione! Wait!"

But I don't, even though my whole body courses with joy, I don't stop walking. His hand roughly spins me and around and he plants a kiss right on my lips.

He's so warm! That's the first thing I can think of. I dropped my bag and wound my hands around him, trying to kiss him as deeply as I possibly can. He's stunned by my enthusiastic response. I can tell because he froze and didn't know what to do for a second.

But then he's just kissing me, lighting small fires in my body.

He pulls away, "Well if I had any idea that's what you were after I would have done it five weeks ago."

Then he smirks.

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><p>Reviews!<p> 


	8. Homesick

Chapter 8- Homesick

Five months. That's how long we've been stuck in the past. The school year only had three more months left and then Harry and I on our own. Dumbledore hasn't pointed it out yet, but he will. He can't very well just let us stay here.

Aside from that constant worry my whole world is perfect. Severus is….amazing to me. Sometimes he kisses me when I'm in the middle of a sentence and then he goes back to whatever we were talking about. At first it surprised me but now I wait for him to do it.

Severus and I have been together for a month now, which has been bliss. He's more than I could have ever asked for.

I walked down the hallway more quickly. He was waiting for me in the Library, but his face was different. Paler than I had ever seen it and he was crying. Merlin, who could ever make him cry!

"Severus? What happened? Are you alright?" I said, grasping his face in my hands, looking him in the eyes. Severus blinked rapidly, sucking in air.

"My father killed himself two days ago after killing my mother. Our family accountant just sent me a letter."

My mind reels, telling me I know what he's feeling, but I don't want to remember right now. I don't! That doesn't matter though and I swear I can hear my father's voice telling me how much he loves me and that it isn't my fault. I hear my mother's gasp as she realizes she's going to die and that I've given Malfoy permission to do so.

I pulled away from Severus as if he's burned me. This pass month was a lie! A vicious lie! How can I ever be with him when he doesn't even know where I was born and who my parents are! Were….

Severus is staring at me as my face expresses what words cannot. He dropped the letter onto the table and reached for me. I stiffened, but let him hold me.

"What's wrong? Why did you react like that? You didn't even know them!"

I could tell him. Right now…but I can't. He'll ask so many questions and I won't be able to answer because-

"I don't belong here!"

I tear out of his arms and run. My legs ache from the strain, but I don't stop. I don't want to be here any longer. I can't stand it. I was a fool to think I could ever have happiness here. I reached my room and crawled into bed. Fridays were the thing I loved most in the world, next to my dead parents.

* * *

><p>Harry's Pov<p>

"Hermione's taken refuge underneath a blanket and won't come out. Can you tell me why?" I snapped at the boy Hermione was best friends with.

Snape freezes and I decide he's guilty. Just as I'm about to hit him with a hex he starts talking in a rush.

"My parents died and I just found out today. Hermione was there when I got the letter and she just freaked and looked like she was seeing a ghost. I don't know what happened."

I didn't expect that. I really didn't expect that. "How did they die?"

Snape flushed with anger, "My dad killed my mum and then himself. What's wrong with Hermione?"

This is bad. Really bad. Hermione and I haven't really talked about what happened to us. What's there to say? Were both sorry about what happened but we can't change it. None of it.

"Her parents were murdered and she was there. Don't ask for to many details. She'll come find you when she'd ready, alright?"

Snape looks pasty and I sneer at him. He really is innocent in this time. I stalked away from him, ready to talk some sense into Hermione.

"Hermione! Get out of bed, NOW!"

She still doesn't move. She didn't even flinch. I ripped the covers off of her body and she just rolled into a ball and reached for a pillow.

"Harry-

"Snape told me what happened and you've got him scared. He thinks he did something wrong! I know it hurts to remember Mione, but he's the one hurting right now, more than you. I think you know that."

She turned to me, fury blazing in her eyes. It's better than seeing them dead and stuck in memories.

"You BASTARD!"

She launched herself at me, her nail tearing at my skin. I hissed at her and gripped her wrist tightly.

"Would you just think for a minute? It's almost been two years! He just lost them this week, Hermione! Use your brain!"

She finally calmed down. She won't look at me, but that's just fine.

"I'm sorry I called you a bastard." She mutters eventually. I let out a bitter laugh.

"It's fine. It's always so damn fine!"

She flinched away from me. I don't really care at the moment. My whole body's tense, ready to snap.

"Go relax Harry, I'm fine now." She ran out of the room before I could say anything else. Relax? How was I supposed to do that?

I feared I knew exactly how. I took off my outer robes and left my room. I couldn't relax in there could I?

She's where she always is. At the same spot in the great hall, snacking and studying for something. She hasn't spotted me yet, and I still have time to leave and never come back. I haven't even looked at her in seven weeks.

Too late, she's seen me. I wait for her reaction. She stopped eating and put her things away in her bag. I smirked involuntarily. She can't just ignore me?

My smirk is gone when she grabbed me by my school tie and dragged me into an alcove in the hallway. She's so close its intoxicating. I take in her appearance, marginally worse than when I saw her last. She hasn't been sleeping.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing staring at me?"

I raised an eyebrow, "You let everyone else do more than look."

She winced, but didn't stop glaring at me. Then she really looked at me.

"You look like shit, Harry." She said bluntly. I laughed, "So do you, Bella."

She stepped closer, "What do you want?"

I slammed her against the wall by her shoulders, glaring down at her, "What do you think I want?" I snarled. I almost can't believe it's me doing this. I've never even been this rough with anyone I was fighting with, aside from Death Eaters. Like her.

She smiled widely, showing bright white teeth. I smashed my lips onto hers, relishing in her pained moan. I think I busted her lip badly. She dug her nails into my skin, ripping it open. I can hardly feel it.

She tangled her hands in my hair, yanking painfully. She bites down onto my neck, tearing the skin open more than she ever has. It feels good, Merlin it feels wonderful.

I can't believe I'm doing this. It's surreal. I pulled back from her just an inch, to see her face. She's breathing harder than I am and blood is trickling down her lips. I leaned forward and licked it away curiously. Copper filled my mouth, but it isn't unpleasant. She moaned, pressing closer.

My hands ripped open her button up shirt, breaking the buttons, but she doesn't even say anything. She panted harder, and I watched as her breast heaved with every breath. It's a wonderful sight. I leaned down and sink my teeth into the creamy flesh, lightly at first, as I've never done it before. She doesn't complain and I bite harder, till I feel the blood rush to my lips. She's wearing a white bra today and I watch the blood seep into the fabric. Then I take it off, watching the blood run down her chest.

I can feel her watching me, but I'm engrossed in what I'm doing. I pulled her down to the ground, hiking up her skirt. Her thighs are heavenly to me, so soft. How did I go seven weeks without this? It's not as if she doesn't like it.

"Harry?"

I stopped what I was doing to her, "Yes?"

"Don't ever stop this. Ever." She said firmly, breathless. My hands slide up her thighs, slowly. It's mesmerizing.

"Never." I lie.

* * *

><p>Hermione's Pov<p>

Severus was upset when I found him. He was sitting at our table in the Library, alone, staring into space.

"Severus?"

He looked up at me with an unreadable expression. "I don't want to talk about my parents. I don't want to talk about yours I just want it to be like it has been for the past month. Can we do that?"

I sigh in relief. "Yes, we can do that."

And that's that.

The next morning, Saturday, Harry and I are called to the headmaster's office. I bid Severus goodbye and ignore the marks on Harry's neck. I know where he went. I should have known he would.

He looked happier than I had seen him in a while though. I can't decide if that's a good thing, considering the reason.

Albus looked at Harry for a long time, drawing his own conclusion to his appearance. Harry really does look bad. His neck has two deep wound, teeth shaped wounds, and his forearms are covered in scratches. That's only what we can _see._ Not to mention his bruised and busted lips. Why didn't he heal them?

"I woke up late. Sorry." He muttered. I rolled my eyes. "I hope it was worth it. I'm not judging Harry. I swear." I added the last part when he glared at me.

"You had something to tell us, Albus." Harry said, changing the subject.

Albus stared at us, curiously. I shook my head. It wasn't _me _that tore his body up.

"Yes, I do. That potion I mentioned a few months ago will work. You're going to be able to go home." He said with a smile.

My heart froze on the inside. "When?"

Albus is confused by are lack of reaction. "The end of the school year. I know I don't have to tell you-

"We know. Thanks for telling us." Harry interrupted, smoothly. Harry pulled me to my feet and out the door. I ripped my hands out of his grasp and walked at his pace without touching him.

"Hermione?" He asked sounding confused.

"Go shower Harry you smell like her. I'm going to see Severus."

Harry stopped me, stepping in front of me. "Why are you spending more time with him than me?"

I feel my jaw drop. Was he serious? Had I never told him?

"He's my boyfriend. Of course I spend more time with him. You've managed to keep yourself busy."

Harry's face paled, making him look like death. I should know what that looks like.

"You're what-!" he exclaimed, letting his arm drop from mine.

"Boyfriend. One I rather like!" I snapped, feeling panic rise in my chest.

"Hermione! It's Snape! He'll hate you when we get home!"

My heart clenched painfully and my eyes started stinging. "I know, but here he doesn't. He cares about me. I'll deal with going home when it happens."

I left Harry standing there and I didn't look back.

* * *

><p>Severus was in the great hall, eating dinner, and he was alone. I sat down next to him, a little reluctant. What if he was angry at me? He smiled at me and pushed his empty plate away. He took my hand and sighed.<p>

"What did the headmaster want?" He asked curiously.

I should tell him now that I was going to leave, but I didn't want him to hurt any more than he already was.

"He was just telling us that our grade were wonderful and told us we were settling in well." I lied smoothly. Severus may have noticed but he didn't say anything.

"Well that was nice of him. Though I get better grades than you."

I raised an eyebrow, "Hardly. I'm top of our class!"

He shook his head, "Not anymore. I beat you in Potions last week. I'm ahead of you now. You're right after me so the second of the class."

He smirked brightly, but I saw something in him falter.

"Severus?" I questioned.

His shoulders slumped, "You don't want to hear about it."

Guilt coursed through me. "Of course I do. I just… it brought up memories. I can listen, Severus. I wouldn't offer if I didn't want to."

He looked at me hopefully. "I wasn't close to my father at all. He was a muggle and he hated magic. He didn't even know my mum was a witch until after I was born. I'm glad that he's dead. But my mum….it hurts more than I would have thought."

I gripped his hands tightly in mine, "It's not going to stop hurting all at once. But I'll be here if you need me." what more could I say. In my case it had never stopped hurting, it hadn't even lessened over time. The shock was gone and I could think rationally around the pain these days, but I still had moments.

Severus nodded, "Professor Slughorn spoke to me while you were gone. He was as sensitive as a dragon."

I winced, "Sorry. I would have scared him away had I been here."

Severus smirked, "My protector?" I nodded smiling. He leaned down to kiss me, and I relished in the sparks that shot through my body.

"I never get tired of that." I whispered softly. Severus laughed lightly, pressing his lips against mine, once, twice, three times. I gripped his face and kissed him harder, tired of his game.

He chuckled against my lips. I could forget about going home. I could forget about anything but Severus for right now.

* * *

><p>AN: wow, this story is going by quickly. Already 20,000 words! Thanks for reading!


	9. A War and Secrets

Chapter 9- A War and Secrets

She was writhing and panting underneath me, seductively. Her lips were abused and muttering expletives as I drove into her. She let out a particularly loud moan, and wrapped her legs around my waist in a tight grip. My fingertips dug into her hips, sure to leave bruises. Not that I cared. At all.

Her eyes were screwed shut, her forehead tense. I leaned forward to change the angle and thrust harder, her face relaxed into pleasure. She muttered my name, arching her back deliciously. Her chest heaved up and down as her breath quickened.

I went faster.

She had that black hair that seemed to everywhere at once. It was shoulder length and I could see pieces of it cover her face and she twisted her head from side to side before throwing in back against the wall. She hissed at the pain of it, but I didn't stop. I wouldn't stop for anything.

I came undone with a stiff spine, and she shuddered under me, letting out the loudest moan yet.

"Harry!" She cried, her eyes closing and her legs tightening around me. I tried to calm my racing heart. I really needed this.

This time had been better than the last. More blood though. Her lips were busted, top and bottom. There must have been at least ten hickeys on her neck alone. It was an astonishing sight. I wondered if she could even cover them all up.

Blood trickled down her chin and I never got tired of the sight. There was a thumb shaped bruise forming on her jaw. Her hips had the exact shape of my hands on them. The tops of her breasts were covered in bites, some rather vicious. Blood dripped down onto her nipples and to her toned stomach. It seemed strange on her creamy skin. Her legs were shaking from over use, but the rest of her was relaxed.

"Every time is better than the last!" she said softly, still a little out of it. I nodded in agreement. I didn't usually talk much after I got what I wanted. What was there to say?

I pulled on my clothes, slowly waiting for her to say her piece. I didn't really mind talking, but I just didn't want her to get any ideas. She was just a whore. Hell, she even said so.

"Harry?" she questioned, sitting up on her elbows completely naked. It was a little distracting.

"Yes?" I said softly, humoring her.

"Why do you always wait so long to come for me?"

It was a reasonable question so I answered honestly, "Because I have to be angry to do what we do."

Her lips started quivering and I was curious. Why would that upset her?

"That's a relief, I was sure you had someone else as well." She said and I realized she was happy with my answer.

I didn't say anything.

"Is there a reason you're so cold to me?" she said suddenly. I looked over at her, she was still sitting propped up on her elbows. I stared at her for a long minute.

"Yes."

I couldn't really see any point in denying it. She obviously noticed my anger towards her personally. I didn't…couldn't like someone like her. Ever.

"Well whatever it is, I'm really sorry. I wouldn't ever hurt you…unless you liked it." Her words were meant to be seductive and sincere, but all I felt was a rage so intense that I brought my fist into the wall nearest me. Rather the wall than her face. I had to remember she hadn't done anything yet. She hadn't murdered and tortured my best friend to death yet.

I felt my magic tingle, a spark spreading through me. I couldn't lose control not here.

She came over to me, still undressed and dragged me into the roughest kiss I'd ever had. And we'd had plenty. It seemed like there was more blood in our mouths than saliva. It helped me calm down though.

"I want to know what I did."

"You haven't done it yet."

The words spilled out of my mouth without warning. My heart clenched painfully in fear and I pulled away from her. She was smiling as if nothing had happened, but I knew she had heard what I said. I could feel the blood all over my mouth and see it running down hers. Why was that sight so alluring? She had a particarly bad bite on her left breast. It was bleeding still because it was too deep.

"Heal that." I said pointing. She looked down and smiled. Bella grabbed my hand and pressed it to the wound.

"Why? I like it." I rolled my eyes and pressed into the wound harder. She hissed.

"Really because that sounded a whole lot like pain." I pulled my hand away, which had her blood on it. She pulled on her skirt and zipped it. I spotted blood running down the wall I just had her up against. She was fastening her bra so I turned her around.

"Bella-

"Don't. Just don't. I know what you'll say. But I don't mind. I can do what ever the hell I want to my body."

"Don't you always." I said coldly stepping away from her. There was a set of fingernail paths, ripping the skin off her back in a long scratch. It was disgusting. Why hadn't she told me? I didn't really like seeing that much of an injury on anyone, even a whore like her.

She pulled away from me and picked her shirt off the ground.

"You know I'm not a whore." She said softly. I snorted loudly.

"No, really Harry I'm not. I've been with two guys in my life. You included. I just…learned quickly to do what he liked."

I didn't laugh this time. I couldn't decide if I believed her. If it was true I'd feel like an arse for doing this. Even if she liked it.

"Whatever." I said finally. My neck was stinging badly. "What did you do to my neck, Bella?"

She smirked, "Bit the hell out of it. Its bleeding a lot."

Well how nice. I was about to say something else when I heard light footsteps coming down the hall. I cursed.

"We'll just have to deal with Detention. I told you this hall was a bad idea."

Bella just nodded and tried to fasten the buttons on her shirt quickly. She couldn't though because I'd broken almost all of them. She looked around for her wand but it was too late, Minerva came into view.

She halted when she spotted us.

"Infirmary, now!" she ordered and I stared at her in disbelief.

"I won't tolerate fighting! You both-

She stopped having gotten a better look at us. Bella had an open shirt on, revealing abused breasts and neck covered in purpling bruises. Thank Merlin Minerva couldn't see the blood all over the wall.

"Were you two-

We nodded, not wanting to actually hear her say it. It was embarrassing enough, because Minerva was like my grandmother.

She got a little pink in the face. "Infirmary." She ordered again.

"Minerva we don't-

"Harry, you'll do well to remember that I am your professor. I said to go to the infirmary, you're both obviously hurt."

Bella spoke for the first time, "You not so old that you don't know what we were doing. We aren't in any danger. It's just a little blood, Professor."

McGonagall stared at Bella for along moment, "I have duties to attend to. As your teacher I have to care for you in every way. To the infirmary and next time don't get caught."

We all headed to the infirmary in silence. I was angry again, because of my slip up earlier and now having two other people know my business. It wasn't something I wanted advertised.

Madam Pomfrey was appalled at me. She had liked me a lot apparently. Well there went that friendship.

"You stupid children! Do you not know what could happen, mixing blood like that?"

I knew very well but didn't care. I doubted Bella had anything; she seemed like a clean whore. She wouldn't get anything from me for sure and wasn't there cures for it all anyway?

We were silent as she healed our cuts. Bella's hands were shaking.

"Dear, take off that shirt so I can see the rest."

She tired, I could tell, but she was too embarrassed and upset. I stood and pulled the shirt off her shoulders carefully avoiding the wounds. Bella nodded her thanks.

Madam Pomfrey said, "Boy you don't need to stare!" I wasn't actually staring, merely assessing the damage, but that didn't matter.

"You should respect a lady not-

"If she didn't want it I wouldn't so it. I haven't permanently hurt her." I snapped, my temper rising at being judged.

Bella went even redder if that was possible, "Harry, stop, they don't understand."

I froze at the sound of her voice. It was the nicest tone she had ever taken with me and I didn't like it. Not at all. I wouldn't be going to her anytime soon. Probably never again. We were going home in a month. The end of the year. Gosh, we'd been doing this for five months now. I hoped she hadn't gotten too attached.

I refused to take off my shirt or any clothing. I also refused to be healed. I don't know exactly what I did, but every time she healed the wound it appeared again two seconds later. She gave up.

Bella wouldn't look at me as we left. I didn't really care. I was looking a Minerva who had just shifted into her cat that I knew well. I stared after her, deep in thought.

* * *

><p>Hermione's Pov<p>

I knew Harry had been with her again when he opened the door at two in the morning.

"I want to become animagus'. "

My jaw fell open in shock. Why-

"Harry it's two in the morning! We'll talk- My gosh you're covered in blood." That was entirely true, but he did have blood on him.

He rolled his eyes. "Harry you know that-

"No I don't know." He snarled, his mood disappearing. He went into the bathroom and slammed the door. He didn't come back out.

I woke up the next morning to see Harry shirtless and turning to see his back in the long mirror since there wasn't one in the bathroom. I stared at him wordlessly. How could he enjoy-

"Mione!" his voice was cold. I looked away keeping my opinions to myself. He didn't want or need them anyway.

"Bella and I were caught last night. I'll be in detention." He said eventually.

"You shouldn't-

"Yes, I should." He cut me off. How did he even know what I was going to say? He pulled on his shirt, without healing the cuts and scratches. His lips were the only thing he healed.

I scoffed and went to get dressed for the day.

It was Saturday so I went to the Library, not wanting to be around Harry when he was so obviously tired from the night before. I hated thinking of why he was so tired. It just wasn't something best friends should think about. It didn't help he was so obvious about it.

I had just sat down at my table with a few books when I saw someone sit across from me. It was Bellatrix. She looked lost and frightened, but more like her older self than I could have thought.

"Yes?"

She hesitated, "I know your secret." She blurted out with a flush.

I raised an eyebrow, "Excuse me?"

"I mean I know you and Harry are from the future. I 'm don't want answers or anything. I just have to tell someone." She sounded desperate.

"What is this about?" I was furious with Harry, why would he tell her anything?

"Harry. I- he- I'm pregnant."

I closed my eyes against the fear I felt. This was something that shouldn't have ever happened.

"Does Harry know?" I was pretty sure he didn't. He would have been more of an arse earlier.

She shook her head, "I won't be telling him either. I guess you can, but I would rather you didn't. You see, Harry doesn't care about me. In fact he hates me more than anything in this world. I'm positive of that. I lied before, I do want an answer."

I think I knew what she wanted.

"What did I do to make him hate me so much?"

I stared at her face, her sinfully beautiful face. She was sincere, but so innocent. Her hair was perfectly in place and I couldn't see any evidence of what she did with my best friend on her.

"I don't think-

"Please, Hermione, please." She sounded so lost and helpless. Her eyes started watering.

"You killed our best friend and tortured me. And you liked it."

I regreted it the moment I said it. It hurt to admit something so painful.

She froze and became impossibly still. Her eyes hardened, "That's why he… THAT BASTARD!"

I flinched away from her angry, it almost rivaling Harry's.

"Don't ever tell Harry. Ever. When are you going home? You are going home aren't you?" Her voice was different. Colder.

"Yes, at the end of the year." I whispered, horrified. I wanted Severus. I wanted him now.

She left me alone, hands shaking.

It wasn't Severus that found me, but Remus. I stared at him for horrified moment before bursting into tears.

My fault! All my fault! Harry was going to have a _child _he would never know about because I couldn't tell him. We couldn't stay here. Remus tried to get answers out of me, but I was too incoherent. My sobs subsided eventually and I just held onto Remus. Just like I used to. I slipped into a darker place, a darker memory.

* * *

><p><em>I stumbled blindly through the spell fire and smoke and the screams, Merlin the screams. Only a month ago my parents and Ron died and now Voldemort was attacking? Harry wasn't with me, even though he had promised.<em>

_I dodged a torture curse. I would recognize that anywhere. The grounds of Hogwarts were covered in bodies, and fire and more bodies. I hated it. Part of the castle was on fire, despite the protective charms on it. I casted a bubblehead charm, so I could breathe something besides smoke. The forbidden forest was on fire and smoke was everywhere. I was sure it was going to rain._

_Harry was with Voldemort, I could see them both a few yards away in a clearing. Death eaters were fighting the order without mercy. I saw Remus struggling with two and sent a killing curse to one. He dropped with a thud, barely heard in all the chaos. Remus looked for who had helped him and disbelief shone on his face when he saw me. Since he was looking at me and not the fight I took care of the second death eater, ready to kill him._

"_Pay attention Remus!" I snarled and ducked as something flew over my head. I turned and saw what Remus was staring at in shock. Tonks' body lifeless just behind me. only part of her. The other half had just flown over my head. Bile rose in my throat. Oh, God…_

_Remus fell to his knees, his whole body shaking. He was too stunned to cry. He let out a scream._

"_Remus we have to move! Get your arse up! Do you want your son to not have a father as well?" _

_Remus either didn't hear me or didn't care about anything besides seeing the mother of his child scattered over the grounds. I felt my stomach turn as the stench of brutally killed bodies reached my nose. It seemed the death eaters were getting angry._

_I couldn't hear what Harry was saying to Voldemort and I didn't have the time to go closer and stand by his side. I bent down to help Remus when a knife embedded it's self into my left shoulder. _

_A scream tore out of my mouth and then I fell to my knees, in shock. Blood gushed from the wound like a spring and spread into the cloth of my shirt. My pretty green shirt. My head felt dizzy and my fingers were all tingly. Remus came into my vision and I felt a searing pain as he ripped the knife out of my shoulder. _

_I fell over, flat on my back. I didn't have the strength to hold myself up any longer.I felt a pleasant shiver run down my shoulder. Remus healed me. He healed me._

"_Hermione, I don't know how much blood you lost. You need to go back to the castle-_

_Something that looked like a bloody spear ripped through Remus' body. It went straight through like a bullet and left a hole…right where his heart should have been._

_Remus did a reenactment of my earlier movements, only this time he didn't scream and he didn't move again after he fell._

"_REMUS!" I screamed, black dots appearing in my vision. This wasn't supposed to happen! Everyone was to supposed to be fine! We planned it all so well._

_But we didn't plan for these sorts of weapons and spells. It occurred to me that the spear had been enchanted to find the heart. Remus' heart. I started sobbing, and crawled over to the body of my best friend._

"_Remus…" I couldn't stop asking him to wake up. He couldn't sleep with all this fighting going on! Intellectually I knew he was dead, but I just couldn't believe it in my heart. My shoulder ached and I felt the last of my strength leave me. I fell into darkness, holding Remus' hand._

* * *

><p>I hadn't even fallen asleep. One moment I was sobbing in Remus' arms and then I was reliving that memory. My shoulder was even aching again.<p>

Remus was holding me, but he was shaking and I cursed myself. What had he heard?

"Hermione…can you stand up?" he asked softly. I thought I could and moved back to my seat. My body was shaking and I could feel the tears all over my face. I couldn't even look him in the face. My heart was stopped in that heavy painful way that just made it seemed impossible to breathe.

"Hermione...deep breaths." He said coming closer. I flinched away and my breathing got quicker. It hurt _so badly_!

"Snape…she had a nightmare of the future…she's scared and I'm not sure…"

My eyes looked up and I saw Severus coming in, but I froze. I was going home! My arm sizzled, telling me Remus had broken his oath. We should have gone with a stronger spell because Severus was looking at me with such surprise I couldn't take it. Harry. I needed Harry.

"Harry!" my incoherent thoughts gathered together and spit out his name, more like screamed it out. I ran out of the Library as fast as I could. Harry was close by, I could feel it. I felt a spark of something tingle on the surface of my skin.

I saw Remus and Severus coming after me, wands out. I shivered and something erupted out of my without my control and I was blinded for moment. Remus and Severus were stunned on the floor.

Well that was what raw wandless magic felt like. Harry rounded the corner and ran over to me.

"They found out. I…don't know! I was remembering to deeply and Remus thought Severus knew…and he broke the oath…I stunned them…Harry what-

Harry wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly. "It's going to be okay, Hermione. It's going to be fine."

I hoped he was right. Guilt tore at my insides. It wasn't going to be alright because I had a huge secret. Harry's secret. I started sobbing into his shoulder and he took it for something else. I'm sorry Harry.

* * *

><p>AN: Well I hope you guys didnt expect that. I'll repeat it just to make sure, Bella and Harry wont ever get together in the 'I love you' way. Severus knows the secret now! Review!


	10. Please

Chapter 10-Please

Harry was insane. I had thought it many times before but now I had proof. He intentionally led me to my room, tucked me into bed and then maybe fifteen minutes later, the door opened and Severus Snape walked in. He was completely silent and sat down on the edge of my bed, staring at me. I hid under my covers.

"Well I see you really aren't a Gryffindor. Surely you wouldn't be hiding if you were." He said in that wonderful voice of his. It could still send shivers down my spine. Merlin, what was wrong with me?

"I'm _not _hiding. I'm merely avoiding confrontation." I replied snappishly. What was he doing here anyway? He knew-

"You weren't born until the eighties. So in your time I would be twenty years older than you." He stated suddenly, sounding curious.

"Yes, I believe you've just turned fifty." I said somewhat reluctantly.

"And you don't really like me."

"Nope."

He let out a bitter laugh, "So this was pay back? Because I was mean to you? Cruel even?"

I sat up, outraged, "Of course not! I couldn't be bothered with revenge. I got over all that. I'm not nearly seductive enough to try and seduce you purely for ulterior motives."

"So you do admit you seduced me?" He urged leaning towards me.

"You- You kissed me first!" I argued. He was impossible! How could I have been the one to seduce him!

"Because you made me chase you. It sounds like seduction, Miss Granger."

I flinched away from him and heard his bitter chuckle again.

"So you're over it? I think not. You may not have consciously decided for revenge but you got it. Potter explained everything to me. He said you were so cold hearted to toy with me. I said if you can stab someone to death you can sure as hell break someone's heart." Severus' eyes went dark, if that was possible and he glared at me with hurt.

"He told you everything?" I said in horror.

"Yes, it's not as if you would have. I see now why my parent's death hurt you so deeply. You killed your own parents." His voice was harsh, much like his older self would be. I was horrified. I had caused all this. Every last bit.

"I didn't toy with you. I fell in love with you."

I wished I hadn't said it. I didn't need him to rip my heart any more than he already had.

"I know." He said, sounding like my Severus, not the cruel imposter. "You're leaving in three weeks. To go home, to my older self."

To his older self? What was he going on about? "Severus-

"Don't. You knew you were leaving and you have for three months. I don't know what I'll be like there but here and right now I love you."

My heart warmed and soared hearing those words for the first time. I didn't realize how much I doubted his feelings.

"That's why I'm going to ask you for something before you leave."

He pulled something out of his pocket, in a blue velvet case. My heart stopped dead.

"I know what you're thinking Hermione. There isn't any way this could happen, but I spoke with the Headmaster. It would take thirty minutes for you to marry me. I want this. I want to know that you loved me and remember you when you're gone. I've known for a long time you were going to leave me. I just didn't know why."

He opened the case and extended it to me. It was gorgeous of course. He knew me so well. It was just a diamond and silver band, but I loved it instantly. He took it out and reached for my left hand. I saw it was shaking. He slid it onto my finger, and looked up to me.

"Say you'll marry me before you leave. I won't see you again for twenty _years_ Hermione. That's a lifetime."

My throat closed at the thought of waiting that long for him. "Hermione-

"Yes. If you'll have me I'll marry you, Severus." I said firmly. I knew I wouldn't regret it.

I was in shock I was sure but then next thing I knew I was being kissed like I'd never been kissed before.

* * *

><p>Present Day 1997<p>

Severus Snape was in the company of Minerva McGonagall when the hit him. He dropped the tea cup he'd been holding and clutched at his head, the images too vivid.

"Severus? What's wrong?" Minerva asked worriedly. Severus hadn't ever lost control like this in her presence. He was always the man of control. He hardly ever showed any emotion besides sarcasm and anger around anyone. This obvious pain and maybe shock was most unexpected.

"My stupidity is what's wrong." He muttered relaxing in his seat as the onslaught of memories ceased.

Minerva glared at him, "Out with it."

There wasn't any need because a silver band materialized on his left hand, secured on his finger. Minerva gasped with understanding.

"Yes, it seems I've bloody well married her."

There was a tense silence until Minerva had the audacity to burst into laughter.

"That's quite enough, Minerva. Remus spoke today. He said, 'She seemed happier then.'" Severus said, turning the subject. He would think about it all later, alone.

"That's wonderful news; it's been months since he returned." She said with a smiled. She was really happy about the news.

"Any news on Sirius?" she asked finally. Severus shook his head, "No, he was dead for what two and half years? It will take more than two weeks. I hope those foolish Gryffindors are happy, meddling in everything."

Severus was in reality, terrified. Sure, people were returning from the dead, but what if the reverse started to happen? Or what if Voldemort returned? A shudder went down his spine.

"I'll be taking care of both Black and Remus. Poppy is assisting us as best she can. We haven't contacted St. Mungos. Who knows if all the people returning to life will appear at Hogwarts, Minerva? That's what we need to worry about."

Minerva heard him loud and clear. Everyone was worried.

Miles away in a long abandoned warehouse a woman jolted back to life with an agonized scream.

* * *

><p>Past 1977<p>

Harry was happy for me, though he kind of turned green when I told him he would have to be there for the wedding. It was so bizarre to think about. I was getting married to Severus! In just a few short minutes some ministry official would marry us. Severus told me it was a straightforward ceremony. We chose not to write our own vows, if only for time's sake. No one was there to hear them anyway. Only Albus, Minerva, Harry and Remus would be present. I'd debated on Lily and James and maybe Sirius, but I felt that I was undeserving. Why should Harry's parents be there for my wedding and not there sons? It didn't seem fair and I was sure it would hurt Harry. So I didn't tell them about getting married and I wore a glamour on my ring. I assumed they would understand, though I wasn't really that close with either of them. Sirius was the only one besides Remus I'd actually had two conversations with.

The ceremony was easy. A simple recitation of three sentences and the famous 'I do.' Severus wasn't planning on kissing me, but I dragged him into one with a smirk.

"Muggleborn honey." I said with a smile, happiness pouring out of me. Severus didn't seem to mind and returned the kiss. I could picture Harry and Remus shifting uncomfortably. Remus hadn't spoken to me for a very long time. I was leaving in a week. Albus said the potion was ready now, but I couldn't leave yet. I needed more time and I told Harry so.

Later back in our room, Severus had gone to sign paper work, Harry hugged me tightly.

"You're a married woman." He muttered in disbelief. I couldn't really believe it myself. I hadn't been able to look Harry directly in the eye since Bellatrix spoke to me. I couldn't. My good mood evaporated.

"We're going home." I whispered softly. Harry stiffened. "Yes."

"I don't really want to." That was a lie. I just wanted Severus to come with me for everyone to be alive again. Ron the most along with Remus.

"I know, but there isn't any choice we can't risk changing too much or we'll have even less to look forward to later on. We'll have to relive Voldemort. That's not what I want."

I said nothing. We might have already changed things too much. Harry left me then, probably expecting Severus to come back soon. I smiled at the thought.

* * *

><p>Harry's pov<p>

Hermione was happy, I could see that, but I was beyond mad. I was hiding it better than ever. She was keeping something from me again and I could only assume it had something to do with Bella.

I found her in her usual place. She wasn't eating or studying this time. She was just alone. There was something different about her.

"Harry." She said but it didn't sound like her. It was gentle. I flinched away from her. I knew this as a mistake.

"I don't want anything from you, just listen!" she snapped, sounding more like I had become used to. I didn't like the soft sentimental Bella any more than the mean bitchy one.

"I know you're leaving, I don't know where you're going, but I won't ever see you again."

I nodded, feeling a spark of confusion. She leaned towards me. "You have no idea how much I care for you. No idea. Do you know what it feels like to know that you hated me so deeply and I won't be able to change it? I'm not stupid Harry; I know I've wronged you horribly. I can't ever fix it. I just want you to know I would if I could."

Her eyes narrowed and her face closed off, "Now go get some sleep, you look exhausted. It's been fun Harry."

And she left.

My mind was racing, trying to understand exactly what she just told me. Cared for me? How was-

Because she isn't a death eater yet and she has a heart…for now. I shook off the feeling of loss and headed for the court yard. Hermione was probably with Snape and I certainly didn't want to be there for that.

* * *

><p>Hermione's pov<p>

Severus was in a better mood than I was when returned. He showered my face in kisses before pulling me into his lap.

"I won't see you again after tonight." He said casually. I froze in his arms, "What?"

"I don't want to see you again before you leave. I think you should leave tomorrow actually." He continued in a calm voice. I could only stare at him wordlessly.

"Why?" I whispered eventually against the hurt.

"I don't want to say goodbye twice. I'll leave you tonight and you'll leave in the morning. I'll wait twenty years and you'll wait five minutes."

He sounded bitter.

"If you didn't-

"But I do think it's worth the wait, Hermione, I'm just not happy about it. I love you, strangely, but I'm going to be alone for a long time. At least Albus will keep me company and so will the Dark Lord. I'm happy you won't be here for that."

I'd forgotten all about his life outside of what he was to me. He was a death eater. A good one at that.

"Okay, Severus. Okay."

How could I refuse him anything when he was willing to wait a lifetime for me?

He stayed with me for a few more hours, he even held my hand. He was polite and formal. He wasn't my Severus.

"Severus! Will you stop wearing that ugly mask! I'm not gone yet!" I snapped suddenly and he smiled cruelly.

"Just practicing, Mione." He said, using my nick name. I smiled and pulled him in for a kiss. He surprised me by avoiding it.

"I don't think I could leave if you-

I understood and cut him off with a deep kiss. It was our wedding night after all.

* * *

><p>AN: I got really bored and typed another chapter. It's shorter than I hoped but I'm happy with how it turned out. It also changes POV alot, I hope that didnt bother anyone. Reviews!


	11. Going Home

Chapter 11- Going Home

I didn't see Severus again. He left sometime after I'd fallen asleep, satisfied and tired. I should have expected him to leave without a proper goodbye. He did leave me a note, expressing his sincere apologies. He loved me, I had no doubt, but I would have been nice to wake up in his arms. My husband's arms.

Harry was distant as we made our way to see Albus. I was sure he knew I was hiding something from him. There wasn't anything I could do but home Bellatrix gave up the child or never told it that Harry was its father. It would make things simpler. I almost caved and told him, but I didn't want to risk his temper right now. I feared the outcome.

I left Remus a letter. Telling him the usual sentimental things. It didn't feel right leaving without a saying something.

Albus had the potion waiting on his desk when we entered.

"Now, I should warn you. It might be painful." That was the first thing he said. Harry and I remained silent as it didn't really matter.

Harry and I stepped forward at the same time and downed our potions without hesitation. A strange sensation erupted all over my skin. I expected Harry felt the same. I looked at him and saw that he was fading away, not disappearing. My stomach took and uneasy turn. Then I knew no more.

* * *

><p>I opened my eyes, groaning, my first thought that I would ask Severus to brew me some headache potions. I could always use those. I looked around and saw I wasn't in the room of requirement. Where-<p>

We were home. Harry was waking next to me and cursing. I stood and looked around us, seeing how deserted everything was. Wasn't it summer here? Had we gone back too far or not enough? We should have asked more questions!

"Ahh, you've returned. Come with me." I spun around quickly and a saw the much aged Minerva.

"Minerva!" Harry said, from his position on the ground. There was something wrong with Harry. I knelt next to him, touching his forehead lightly. Harry struggled to stand up and winced. Had he landed to hard?

"Harry?" I asked stepping closer. He smiled sadly, "I'm fine. Just sore. Let's go see everyone."

I nodded and turned my attention to Minerva, who was staring at us with a hardened expression.

"What happened? What did we change?" I whispered to her, fearing the worst. Her expression darkened and she turned and swept away. I struggled to keep up with her, leaving Harry behind.

She didn't say a word until we entered the infirmary.

"You changed everything." She said in a firm voice. My eyes were glued to the four beds that were occupied in the infirmary. I turned and sealed the door, locking Harry out.

"He doesn't know!" I said urgently. Minerva's eyes widened comically, "How in the-

"She was different there Minerva, and she loved Harry. She asked me not to tell and I didn't."

Bellatrix Lestranges and what looked to be her daughter were lying in to beds side by side. It was surreal. I looked over to the other beds, hoping and praying but no…Ron wasn't there. He was still gone.

"Remus was the first to come to us. Then Sirius. Two weeks ago Bellatrix Lestranges and her daughter Helen woke up in a warehouse." Minerva said softly, but my mind was racing too quickly.

_Remus!_

I ran to his side, heart pounding out of my chest. It was him! He was real and in front of me. Oh gosh, Teddy had a father now! Remus stirred and opened his eyes.

"Mione? You're back?" he said his speech slurring from sleep. I nodded wordlessly, my eyes shining. I tackled him in a hug, practically crawling on top of him in joy.

"Severus has been helping Poppy with them, especially Bellatrix. He said that she's almost another person, not the death eater he once knew. She still killed Ronald, but she said it was pay back for breaking her heart and leaving her with nothing. I honestly suggested turning her over to the ministry but-

"No. You don't know what Harry did Minerva, not all of it. He treated her like dirt and back then she was just a girl." Ignoring how my heart picked up at the sound of Severus' name. I glanced down at my diamond ring, still on my finger.

"Ahhh, Severus has been beside himself with irritation. He couldn't get the ring off you see."

I burst into laughter, "That's because I charmed it when he wasn't looking!"

Minerva smiled a little and looked back to the door.

"He wont come in. I warded it strongly he'll know there's a reason." I sat on the edge of Remus' bed, looking at the familiar faces. Sirius was sleeping deeply, but he looked younger somehow.

"Sirius hasn't spoken. He was dead longer than the others." Minerva said softly.

"Harry will get him to talk." I said and sighed. This was so much more than I ever expected.

"Hermione!" I spun to see Bella sitting up, her green eyes wide. I moved over to her side, surprised that I wasn't angry. I should be considering she killed Ron when she knew exactly what it would do to us.

"I didn't kill him. Lucius did it. I tortured him just like you remember but I didn't kill him. I swear it. I couldn't, knowing it was the reason I lost everything." She whispered so softly no one else could hear. I believed her. I shouldn't have so easily but why should she lie?

"I want to see him before I leave for Azkaban. Please." She pleaded. I frowned.

"Why would you-

"I'm a death eater Hermione. I never killed anyone, but I made so many people believe I had. You've no idea what I've done for the dark lord."

I couldn't argue with that, "I'll let him in, but I can't guarantee anything."

Her curly wild black hair swung as she nodded. I took down the wards and opened the door. Harry walked in slowly. He froze predictably when he saw everyone. Remus was silent, thank God.

"Harry, you look like shit." Bella said after moments of silence. Harry surprised me by smiling evilly, "So do you, Bella."

Bella let out a genuine laugh and her eyes glittered with happiness. I felt my heart clench. She wouldn't ever have his love.

"Who is that?" Harry pointed to Helen. Bella was silent, staring at her daughter. I swallowed the fear in my throat.

"Harry, this is Helen. You're daughter." I said into the silence. Apparently no one else was going to speak up.

Helen was still fast asleep; I suspected they had been sedated. Harry paled so visibly I feared he would faint.

Harry walked over to Helen, looking more closely. He hadn't noticed Sirius or Remus. Or Ron's absence. Helen shifted in her sleep and turned over so her face was visible. She looked almost identical to Lily Evans. Her hair was black, but had Lily's straightness and silkiness. Her nose was small and pert. We couldn't see her eyes but they were most likely green. Harry was speechless, stunned by the resemblance.

"What's her full name, Bella?" He asked suddenly, his voice so gentle Bella winced.

"Helena Marie Potter. Her name she went by was Lestranges. I didn't need Lucius to be suspicious." Bella said quietly. I felt horrible seeing the look of longing on her face.

I turned back to Remus, leaving Harry to his newfound daughter that looked to be his own age. Sirius was waking up. Harry didn't notice when I walked over to him and waited for him to open his eyes.

"Hermione? You and Harry are back? It's about damn time!" He snapped sitting up. He didn't sound like a man refusing to talk. Harry heard his voice and his whole face lit up.

"Siruis!" He exclaimed loudly. I hadn't seen him so happy in a long time. My heart ached to go find the person that made me that happy, but I knew I had to wait. He would need more time. Or he might even never want to be with me, Husband or not.

"Hermione you should go see him."

I shook my head at Minerva, "He wouldn't like the surprise. I'll see him later today." She wanted to protest but she could tell it wasn't going to help. I needed time to adjust, see the weasely's and everyone that had returned.

"Does-

"No one besides Poppy, Severus and I know anyone has returned. A few people know you went to the past, Molly and Arthur were visiting one day and saw you."

I nodded, remembering Molly at the school once, "Well I can tell them myself. Then I'll go see Severus."

I left before she could say anything and headed to the nearest floo. The halls were empty but they felt sadder somehow than in 1977.

"Hermione!" Molly cried when I fell out of their floo. I smiled and pulled her into a hug. I missed her hugs.

Aruthur, Gorge, Ginny, Bill, and Charlie all took turn bringing in the hugs and cries of happnies. Ginny particularly wanted to hug me forever.

"Everyone sit down, I have some good news. I assume you all know Harry and I had an accident and went to the past. We've been there four six months. Apparently we changed a few things about this time. I don't want you to get your hopes up, but Ron isn't back nor is Fred, but a few people have returned to us. Remus and Sirius." I jumped right in, unable to hold back my excitement. Molly demanded to see them, saying they couldn't be getting their hugs all alone in that castle. I laughed.

"I hugged Remus enough. You can come tomorrow I'm sure. There is one thing I'm positive you wont like. I never told you who kill your son Molly. I couldn't bear to remember, but in my memory it was Bellatrix Lestranges. Harry will explain more to you all later, but she didn't kill him. The past changed and apparently Lucius kill Ron along with my parents."

Molly's smile flattened but she nodded in thanks. "Thank you Hermione. Thank you."

I gave everyone more hugs and was about to leave when Ginny spoke up, "Nice ring Mione."

I glared at her half heartedly. Everyone's eyes were glued to my left hand,where my diamond sparkled.

"Well guys, I'm married." I said bluntly into the silence. Ginny squealed and pulled me into the tightest hug of all. Molly looked to happy to describe and the boys were just in shock.

"I won't say who just yet. This man has waited twenty years for me, it might not work out." I warned, but Molly just snorted.

"A ring that beautiful must come from a man who would wait forever. Congratulations Hermione. I'm happy for you, though I wish I could have planned you a wedding." She added with a smile.

I left them all talking about my mystery man and flooed back to Hogwarts to find him myself. I went to his rooms, half sure he wouldn't be there. I was allowed in. The wards had been keyed to me! I sat down on a nearby sofa and rested my head. I was tired and it felt like I'd been back for days instead of four hours.

The door creaked open and my Husband walked in.

* * *

><p>AN: Chapter 11 guys! Maybe three or four more chapters unless I get a new idea for the story. I hope you all like it.


	12. Time

Chapter 12- Time

For one moment, pure shock covered his face. I soaked in his appearance. He was a man now, not a teenager. He shoulders were broad and he just looked beautiful to me. He always had while we were together. I felt my heart release a strong weight as he stared at me and I stared at him. He let the shock wear off then he was walking across the room without glancing at me. He paused when he reached me and held out his hand. I had prepared myself for this and restrained myself from jumping into his arms.

"No." I said with a smug smirk. He outrage was tangible but I didn't flinch when he roughly pulled his left hand away from me.

"_Why not?" _ His tone made my smile disappear. I stood, feeling an anger and hurt that I hadn't felt so acutely before. Not from him. I stepped closer and gripped his left hand.

"Because you're my _husband_." I sneered fiercely, a sneer that would rival one of his. I learned from the best after all. He paled instantly and yanked his hand away from mine.

"Miss Granger, I think you've made a mistake-

"Severus I know it's been twenty years for you. I'm not stupid; I'm not expecting anything…yet. But I refuse to take it off. You may have lived a life time without me but I'm still very much in love with you and I won't stand for your sarcastic and hurtful comments towards me or our relationship. Do you understand?" My temper had grown throughout my rant and I could feel the electricity in the air.

He closed his eyes and I saw him clench his fist. I took a calming breath, "If you wouldn't be such a bastard all the time I wouldn't have yelled. I'm sorry. I won't be staying much longer. Sit down, I need some answers."

He glared at me furiously but I shoved him towards the sofa and sat him down roughly. He struggled obviously but I didn't mind one bit. It was a relief that he wasn't disgusted to touch me. My skin tingled remembering just how much he had touched me the night before. Of course it had been twenty years for him.

"Stop being childish, Severus. You're a grown man. Surely you can deal with your upset wife?" I teased harshly, hoping to irate him. Merlin knows I knew how to do that. Sure enough, Severus flushed with anger and sat stiffly in silence.

"Now, I doubted Minerva knew so I wanted to ask about the health of Bella and Helen?" He obviously hadn't been expecting that sort of question and I grinned widely. It was nice to see that expression on his face.

"Bella? You're calling her Bella?" he said with a snort. My heart rate increased, flushing my skin. Not because I was embarrassed, hardly, but he just was so close and I couldn't touch him. Part of me was waiting for him to start kissing me while I was talking. My heart squirmed painfully in my chest, that wouldn't happened for quite some time if ever.

"Yes, how are they?" I would have asked Poppy but I wasn't ready to deal with her and this gave us something to talk about.

"Bella has not been well. She woke up in the same place Potter and you kill her. Her daughter appeared to us in the hospital wing, knowing us all by name and eventually we gained the memories of her as well. She is bright, extremely so and ruthless much like her mother."

"Personality?" I asked memorizing his words to I could tell Harry. Severus shifted uneasily, "Thanks what bothers me! She is so different! Considerate and kind. Poppy tripped to other day, and hurt her wrist. Bellatrix helped her into a bed and healed it, laughing it off. 'Helen used to break her wrist all the time!' It was like she had no idea of who she used to be."

A hollow feeling filled my chest and I put my head in my hands. Severus was a man, a sarcastic and private one. He wouldn't understand without it being explained.

"Miss Granger?" he asked uncertainly. It didn't sound like concern only curiosity. I cursed my heart that even that could sting.

"Harry shouldn't have ever gone near her. But that would be like saying I shouldn't have gone near you. Harry hates her more than anything in this world. But Bella loves him anyway. She had his child for God's sake!" I burst out in frustration. I sat down on the couch, away from him. He wouldn't just move away. My eyes started to burn. I was getting too emotional.

Severus was getting uncomfortable. I stood abruptly and stared down at him.

"Don't you think for one second this is over. I won't let go that easily." I leaned down and pressed a kiss to his stunned face. He was too shocked to yell at me as I left the room. A kiss on the forehead left him speechless? He wouldn't know what hit him.

* * *

><p>Harry's Pov<p>

I should have known I wouldn't get away that easily. I used Bella for my own needs and this was pay back. I didn't mind having a daughter, I just minded have _her_ daughter. Bella didn't deserve a daughter. I didn't either if I got technical. But I did have one and she was awake now.

"Does she-

"Yes. She'll recognize you." Bella said softly and went to the other side of the room. Giving me space. That was smart. She had always been smart.

"Dad?" she exclaimed in shock sitting up quickly. I jumped at the title. After never having a father to say that to and then suddenly having a daughter that called me that… I wasn't even making sense!

"Helen?" I whispered her unfamiliar name. It could have been worse. She smiled tightly and grabbed my arm to pull me closer.

"We're going to have a very long talk. Now." she hissed, her bright green eyes flaring up. I gulped and looked at Bella-

"Don't even look at her!" Helen snapped pure fury in her voice. I was so confused. She got off the bed and we left the infirmary in a rush.

"When I was fifteen I asked Mum who my dad was, I hadn't ever asked before. I thought perhaps she'd been raped or didn't know. Boy, was I wrong. Kinky stuff dad." She said with a huff. She sat down in the empty hall and I followed after her, flushing. What had Bella been thinking tell-

"She didn't tell me, she showed me. The day I asked she just looked at me and burst into tears. She pulled out her memories and pushed me into the pensieve. I had no idea… I saw everything. I want you to answer me one thing. Do you love my mother?"

My stomach turned at the thought, "Of course not how could I-

"Because she tried to save him! Your best mate, she tried to save him and Lucius, the bastard, killed him! She wouldn't eat or talk or sleep for two weeks after that! I knew from the memory that was why you hated her so much. She almost died! I was only eight years old then so I didn't know when I happened but I – why can't you love her? She hasn't ever done anything to hurt you. She's dedicated her whole life to you. She loves you more than me!"

Helen was crying silently now, around her rant. I was stunned. She didn't kill Ron? Lucius?

"She's still a death eater and I couldn't-

"Liar! She's not more a death eater than Severus is! She was spying as well! Do you know how happy she was when the dark lord died! She smiled so much! I hadn't seen her that happy and it was all because of you. You're my father, biologically. I don't know you but I know enough. If you want to have anything to do with me then you'll have to forgive her. I can't make you love her, but you'll have to forgive her. Forgive her something she didn't even do."

My world felt like it had shifted completely. My heart was racing, "I can do that. I think I can do that." I whispered.

Helen smiled and nodded, "I knew you would. Or I would have made you." I gulped.

* * *

><p>Hermione's Pov<p>

I didn't see Severus for a whole week. Harry told me that under no circumstances would he ever fall in love with Bella, but I had my doubts. He may never love her but I thought they might get together as a family. Helen was a delight. She was strong willed and hardly ever took no for an answer. Harry was obviously at lost and usually just nodded right along with her. Bella was a mess. She cried at night and during the day she avoided Harry at all costs. I would have to talk to him about that.

Minerva was against sending Bella to prison. Now that everyone had firm memories in their heads, no one doubted her. Severus was with Bella all the time and if I didn't know how much Bella loved Harry I would have been jealous. It was nice to know Bella had a friend though.

It was nice to see her lively and without so much hate clouding my vision. She was my friend. It was surreal to even think it.

"Hermione? What have you done to Severus? He's a bundle of nerves. Every time I mention your name he stiffens! And not in a good way!" she complained once I entered the infirmary. She was staying there alone now. Remus and Sirius had moved to Grimauld place. I burst into laughter.

"I was blunt with him the day I came back. I'm going to see him tonight as well. He had the audacity to ask me to take his ring off!" Bella went to rant about the disrespect.

"I have tricks up my sleeve of course. He won't get away." I assured her.

"Have you told anyone?"

I nodded with a smile, "Yes, the reactions were amusing. Ginny said, No fair! I was a sarcastic bastard for a husband too'"

Bella laughed deeply, then wiped away tears, "That was the best thing I've heard in months. Not to mention I've only been alive for two months."

I cringed, "By the way, I'm sorry for stabbing you."

"I don't remember it. I don't even have a scar. It's like it never happened."

I wished that were true in my memories.

On my way to see Severus I found Harry sitting alone in a hallway, "Hey!" I shouted, but he didn't jump.

"You need to go in there." I whispered and he nodded in agreement.

"I'm just upset. I've let go of most of the anger, but I don't know how to not hate her. It's all I ever did."

"I know Harry, but try. I think she'll surprise you." I left him to his thoughts and headed to the coldest floor in the castle. The wards still let me in and Severus blinked in surprise.

"How did you get the password?" He demanded sharply.

"I didn't. The wards allow me in." I would have thought he knew! He was sincerely shocked though and I didn't have anything to say about it.

"Why would they-

"Perhaps because I'm your wife by law?" I cut him off with a glance. There was one reason I was here.

"If I ask you something will you promise not to lie?" He was so shocked at seeing me again; I could tell by his behavior, that he didn't notice the three drops of potion that fell into his tea.

I leaned closer, "Well?"

"Very well. Ask away." His voice betrayed his nerves. He took a sip of his tea with shaking hands. It must kill him to be so vulnerable with me.

"Do you want to be my husband?"

"Yes." He looked confused and then outraged.

"You insolent-

"DO YOU LOVE ME?" I screamed over him.

"Yes."

I stood and gripped the front of his robes, "Then what are you waiting for? I'm right here in front of you waiting!"

"You're too young! I couldn't-

"I'm going to be twenty one, Severus. That's nothing in wizarding years and your only fifty and you look thirty. Get over it! You love me. There's nothing in the way."

My chest was heaving and I waited in silence for him to do or say anything.

"There is a problem. You just _violated _my trust Hermione. Twenty years of waiting and this is the thanks I get?"

He said it to hurt me, because I knew he wouldn't focus on something so trivial.

"Yes I did because you are everything to me. I would do anything to have you again."

I never claimed to be a saint. I just wanted my husband.

"I guess you'll need to wait and understand that I'm a different man. Not a seventeen year old anymore. You need to grow up and except it when you're told no!" His face was angry and he towered over me.

"Why wait when you can teach me now!" I snapped, hurt and angry. This wasn't what I had planned.

He was silent.

"I think you should leave. I need more time to think."

Relief. I could wait. He waited. I could wait forever.

"Okay. Okay. I'll go, but I love you, Severus. I do."

"I know, Hermione. I know."

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><p>AN:Here we go! I hope you all like this! Reviews make me smile... a lot.


	13. The Prophet

Chapter 13-The Prophet

The Daily Prophet

_Miss Hermione Granger is now a Mrs.! Our dedicated war hero had tied the knot! We are not aware of when the event took place, or where, but the proof is in the photo. A dazzling ring adores her left hand and there are speculations as to who her mystery man, or woman, is! If anyone has any information on who was lucky enough to land a war hero, let us know! The wizarding world is waiting anxiously._

_Written by Rita Skeeter_

It was absurd how much the wizarding world ate up my life. Then headline was splashed across all the papers, with a picture of me from two years ago in my fifth year. I knew I looked much different now. I looked down at my ring, which I hadn't taken off. I got a lonely feeling every time I looked at it. I messed up. Severus was angry with me, which I had expected, but I hadn't anticipated his…disappointment. It felt worse than I could have imagined. We were all staying at Hogwarts until plans could be made. I would be joining Minerva as a part time Transfiguration teacher, as she was now Headmistress. I was honored that she would have even thought to ask me. Harry was planning on another year at Hogwarts. I was surprised; I would have thought he'd be tired of school. Minerva was glad to have him and I was waiting for the chance to tease him in class.

Helen would be in her seventh year as well. She was two years younger than her father. I found this bizarre, but Harry worshiped the ground she walked on. I thought it was sweet. Harry still hadn't spoken to Bella. Helen was waiting patiently, but I knew she had limits. For now no one knew who Helen's father was, just like before, but there was a chance of people getting the wrong idea. Helen and Harry spent a lot of time together and they were so close already. I feared that when school started they wouldn't like the rumors. There was nothing for it though.

Remus would be the DA teacher once again, but perhaps for longer. Severus was returning to Potions, without a fight. I didn't know if he knew about my choice to stay here.

Bella was going to take Madam Pomfrey's job. Apparently she went to healing school with surviving as a death eater.

"He only needed me when he felt alone. I was his prized death eater. More so than Severus. I had plenty of time on my hands, and he never knew of Helen."

Even if I objected to Minerva's choice, I couldn't do anything about it. Harry was beside himself. He would be in the hospital wing, without a doubt. I might hex him myself to get him there. He couldn't avoid the woman forever.

I felt bad for Bella, her unrequited love, but she was lucky he forgave her. He seemed so much more alive now that all the anger and pain was seeping away.

Sometimes the memories crept up on us, sweeping us away, but it was getting better. I wasn't afraid anymore and I wasn't hurting so badly. What was hurting me now was the love of my life didn't want me.

Tears stung my eyes and I just let them fall. It was cathartic. I hadn't cried, really cried, since I'd gotten back. It was like I triggered a breakdown, but sobs ripped from my chest in the worst and most painful way. I couldn't stop them and I was just thankful that I was alone. Harry was who I needed, but I wanted Severus to take care of me. I had gotten so used to not being alone that now I was at loss. Harry was getting used to being a father and befriending his daughters' mother, he didn't have time for-

"Hermione?"

I cried harder. Why did he have to show up right when I wanted him but not for the same reason? I kept picturing the look on his face when he…

More sobs.

Warm hands wrapped around my shoulders and I clung to them like nothing else. I needed this. I needed him. He held me tightly, stroking my hair just the way he used to, until I fell asleep.

* * *

><p>I woke up alone, but in his room. I recognized it straight away. He was sitting at his desk, writing. I relaxed, steeling myself. I didn't know what he would say. I watched the way his black hair fell into his face, shielding his eyes. I knew they were the darkest Onyx. And endless.<p>

"Is there a reason you're staring?" He asked softly as he conjured two cups of tea. I drank it slowly, savoring the flavor. I loved the warmth that slipped down my throat.

"Why were you staring?" He asked again, more directly.

"Because you're beautiful." I blurted, but I wasn't surprised he spiked my tea. I was fair enough and there wasn't anything I wouldn't admit to have him. He could violate my trust as much as he wanted.

He froze in what he was writing and looked up at me, confused. My heart clenched. He didn't know how beautiful he was to me.

"Why did you except the job?" He continued with a shake of his head. I swallowed sharply, "Because I've always dreamed of working with Minerva. She's like a second mother to me. I need someone who knows me enough to be flexible. She was there when…anyway I also didn't want to have to go away to work. You wouldn't be there."

His face softened fractionally. He may have not even realized.

"Did you plan to seduce me in the past?"

Hurt and anger rose up inside me, making tears come. "_No._"

My voice cracked embarrassingly, but my heart hurt. How could he think such a thing? He stood and came to sit next to me.

"What do you want from me?" He whispered, avoiding my eyes.

"I want you to love me."

He looked at me, reading my face for something. I stared into his black eyes, eyes that I loved _so _much.

"I think I can do that." He said softly, moving closer to me. His presence was so different yet the same as I remembered. My breath got just as he pressed his lips to mine. He was gentle, of course, but I was just fine with that. I enjoyed his kisses, no matter what. He was everything to me.

* * *

><p>Harry's Pov<p>

Helen was planning something. I figured it out when she snuck up on me and bashed the back of my head in. I now had a painful concussion and was heading to the infirmary on unsteady feet. I also had felt her pour something down my throat.

I didn't even want to know what it was. Helen pushed me through the door and closed it behind me. I felt a pair of hands; small warm hands lead me to a bed. I knew it was Bella, my heart always raced when she was around.

My head was pounding and my whole body was hyperaware. Particularly one part of my body. I felt the concussion heal and the pounding left with it. I opened my eyes to see her face hover close to mine, concern marring her features.

Flames leapt through my body and smashed my lips to hers in a frenzy of lust. She let out a strangled moan of surprise and want. She didn't pull away or anything remotely Gryffindor. She kissed harder than I was, climbing onto the bed, on top of me.

"Helen did-

"I know. I saw her closing the door behind you. I'm not stopping if that's what you want." She said breathlessly before sinking her teeth into my neck. Memories and pleasure mingled with pain flooded through me with lightning speed. I missed this. I flipped us over, ripping open her shirt. She was forty years old and I was only twenty, but somehow her body still felt just as I remembered. I pulled the curtains around us and casted a silencing charm. There wasn't any stopping this.

"Harry? I don't-

I silenced her with my bruising kiss. We would figure it out later. Much later. I tore off my shirt, giving her the bare skin to sink her nails into. More than once I thought I would pass out from the pleasure of it.

"Don't leave me. Don't leave me." she whispered, panting so hard I was surprised she could get the words out.

I pushed myself inside her, "I won't leave."

It was a lie. It's what we were all about. Lies. I couldn't even feel that badly either. We could have this part of a relationship and she could love me, but I didn't think I would love again. Ever.

"Thank you Harry. Thank you." She whispered as she writhed and shuddered underneath me. She knew I was lying. I wouldn't ever give her what she wanted. But…this would be enough. More than enough for me. Enough for forever.

* * *

><p>AN:One more chapter to go and its an Epilogue. I hope you've all enjoyed the story!

marianna79- You left reviews with questions but you private messaging feat. is disabled. I hate leaving questions without answers! Thanks for you reviews even though this story is finished!


	14. Epilogue

Epilogue- Five Years Later

"Helen you cant possibly-

"Yes, I sure as hell can Dad. He's a person. Not just a no good Slytherin. I can marry whoever I damn well please."

I sighed, admitting defeat; it wasn't as if I ever had a chance of winning anyway.

"Do I at least get to go to the wedding?"

She smiled, "Of course, who else is going to give me away?"

I stared at her in shock, "You mean you want-

"It's what I've always wanted." Helen looked different to me then, like a little girl that never had a father. I nodded too moved for words. I'd gotten soft in the last five years.

"Okay Helen, anything you want." She smiled victoriously and hugged me tightly.

"You have to bring mum, though." She said and ran away with a laugh. I shook my head. She was one of a kind.

"Harry? What are you doing here this late?" I turned to see Bella in a pink night gown, rubbing her eyes as if she had just woken up. I looked her up and down, sighing. She was just too beautiful without even trying. She was 45 years old!

"Helen told me about her…_Fiancée_." Bella opened her eyes properly and let out a laugh.

"He's a nice boy. I don't see a problem. At least they're getting married before having kids." She said softly, with a light heart. I felt a spark of guilt run through me. I still felt bad that Bella had to have my daughter without my help. Not that she needed it.

"She wants me to walk her down the aisle."

Bella's eyes widened fractionally and she grimaced. "I've always known she wanted that."

"I didn't realized that she cared that much. I'm glad she does."

"Me too. It keeps you around." Bella said with a sigh. "I'll see you later, Harry. I'm too old to be up all hours of the night."

She was lying. Maybe it was because she was so tired but she was lying so plainly it was an invitation to get upset with her.

"You could at least lie convincingly." I snapped, my temper flaring for no reason. Sometimes she just brought it out of me. She paused in her steps and turned back to me.

"Why? You don't."

I flinched away from her accusing tone, "Bella-

"Don't. Okay? Just go home. I'm too tired to be nice right now."

"I've never wanted you to be nice to me. I hardly expect it." I hissed, stepping closer to her. This was her house, her's and Helen's and I'd been here frequently but for some reason it felt like I lived here too.

"What do you want?" she demanded stepping down from the stairs. I felt my stomach flip. I still couldn't believe just how much I still wanted her. Five long years later.

"I want to move in with you. Helen will be leaving after the wedding I'm sure." I blurted. I felt her freeze up and glare down at me, but she also wanted the same thing. I knew she did. It was bad of me to play on her feeling to get what I wanted but…oh well.

"Why would you want to do that?" She asked sharply. I smiled widely.

"Because I care about you and I want to be with you in a relationship." Lies. I wanted nothing more than to be her friend that she slept with. She sighed, seeing through my lies.

"Okay, Harry. Okay, whatever you want like always." She sounded sad. I grabbed her arm and pressed a kiss to her lips. Every kiss we'd ever had always included blood and pain, but this one was just sweet and gentle. Her whole body shivered and I pulled away.

"Thank you."

Bella put a hand to her lips in astonishment and I grinned.

"I'll move in next week!" Then I flooed back to my place to start packing.

* * *

><p>Hermione's Pov<p>

"Did you hear?" I asked Severus from across the room. He was getting dressed for another day of teaching, while I still had two hours before I had to go and teach. I loved working part time.

"About?"

"Helen's engagement."

"No, but now I have." I smiled and propped myself up on my elbow with some difficulty.

"Harry's going to give her away." Severus paused in buttoning his robe and turned to me with a raised eyebrow. I loved that look.

"Really? That's cause a scandal. Why would he insist on-

"He didn't even ask. Helen did." Severus was surprised and it wasn't often you could surprise him.

"Well good for them I suppose. It can't be comfortable lying like that." He added looking down at my bulging stomach. It looked a lot like a balloon to me.

"It's not, but I cant see over the damn thing." I muttered and flopped down onto my back gently. Being pregnant wasn't an experience I was ever going to repeat. I suspected he was secretly happy to be a father but he had never said.

"It's not her fault you like to ogle me while I dress, Hermione." He said mockingly.

"No, but it doesn't make me any less irritated. I love watching you dress!" I argued, sounding like a child. I didn't mind though.

"Two more months and you'll be able to see just fine. Though all you had to do was turn your head and it wouldn't have mattered." He said softly, a smirk on his lips.

" I wanted to look that way! This is ridiculous."

"I agree."

"Good for you." I snapped and struggled to my feet. My night gown only barely covered my thighs and I practically waddled to the bathroom.

"Lovely, graceful even." He called after me.

"For that I'll be interrupting your class today." I hollered back, meaning it. He thought he could hide me away! We'll see about that.

Thirty minutes later I was dressed in some awfully girly yellow sun dress. Ginny's doing. Severus had never seen me in it, probably didn't know I had it. But the point was that it made super obviously of my condition. Not to mention the waddle. I pushed back my wild mane with a headband that had a hideous white flower on it, along with comfortable yellow flip flops. Minerva could try and make me wear those heaving teaching robes. I refused. Up until a month ago I had and now it just killed my back too much.

I exited his private bedroom and then his living quarters. I opened the door to his classroom, where he was teaching. He stopped midsentence and looked over at me.

"Sorry to interrupt. Don't mind me." I said with a smile. All his students were whispering to each other, while Severus stared at me.

"You look beautiful." He whispered softly but everyone heard. I blushed.

"Thanks, Severus." I smiled widely. This was working better than I thought it would.

"You could have used the floo!" he said after a moment.

"I would have fallen. I did last week." I told him and exited his classroom, waddling down the hall. I had two classes today. People stared but I didn't care. I was comfortable and waddled at my own pace. Minerva was waiting for me outside the classroom.

"Hermione you can't-

She stopped her sentence and looked at me strangely. "You always were an odd one. Come in then." She led me to her office while we waited for the class to end.

"You look beautiful."

"Severus said the same thing. In front of his entire class of fourth years." I added with a smirk.

She burst into laughter. "Things are going good, then?"

"Things are perfect." I said honestly.

* * *

><p>AN:Well this is the end! I'm actually happy with how this story turned out. I hope you've all enjoyed it. Thanks to my top reviewers DZmom and TequilaNervous for all their support! Until next time.


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